How to Talk to People You Disagree With

Sometimes, life may toss you in the ring with someone you can't seem to agree with no matter how hard you try. If you are in a professional situation with this individual, where you have no choice but to talk to them, you might be wondering how you do this. Considering the two of you don't agree on anything, it might be tough. Keep reading to find out how you can talk to people you disagree with in situations like this. 

 

Choose Your Battles

 

First and foremost, when you know that you and another person disagree about a subject, it may be best to try and avoid bringing up this subject whenever possible. This way, you won't have to worry about talking to them about something you disagree with as frequently.

 

Keep Conversations Neutral

 

If opposing viewpoints do come up, try to keep the conversation on neutral ground. You can do this by asking questions about the other person's viewpoint and ensuring that you don't raise your voice. You can also redirect the conversation away from a part that might be especially sore for the two of you. 

 

Look For Where You Agree

 

Even if you can't agree on everything, it's also impossible that you disagree with everything they say as well. So when you are talking through a topic that you disagree about, highlight the parts you agree on. For example, you can say, "I agree with X opinion, but it's the Y that I am still not sure I agree with. Let me tell you why" this way, the person knows you are listening and exactly what you disagree about. 

 

Tell Stories

 

Some topics are bound to start a debate, especially if you and this individual are different. So instead of discussing things like current events, try to stick to telling stories instead. This is because stories are your recount of an event, and it will be hard for this individual to disagree with them, thus keeping the two of you in neutral territory. 

 

When it comes to talking to people that you disagree with, this can be a difficult task. But if you know the two of you disagree, then as long as you do your best to avoid the topics of disagreement and keep the conversation neutral, you shouldn't have a problem. If you disagree, try to find the places where you agree to keep the disagreement respectful. If all else fails, tell a story and let them try to disagree with that!

Top 3 Tips to Keep a Disagreement Respectful

It can be difficult to keep a disagreement respectful, especially if you are arguing over something you care about a lot. However, it's important to always be respectful during a disagreement so that no one's feelings are hurt, and relationships don't get destroyed. Below are three tips for keeping a disagreement respectful.

 

1.    Don't Put Down The Person's Beliefs

 

No matter what you are arguing about, try to keep it on the facts alone. Don’t bring either of the parties’ personal beliefs into the argument because this can quickly transform the argument from a simple disagreement to feeling like a personal attack. Find a disagreement to be quickly going in a personal direction? It may be time to agree to disagree before the argument has a chance to escalate to personal levels. 

 

2.    Use The Word I Instead of You

 

In an argument, when you use the word you frequently, it can often come across like you are directly attacking the other person, even if you don't mean for it to sound that way. In places where you would normally say "you," try changing the sentence so you can use the word I instead. For example, instead of saying, "You never do the dishes," you could say, "I feel like I am always the one to do the dishes” see how this changed the feeling and focus of the argument?

 

3.    Listen Actively

 

One of the best ways to keep an argument respectful is by ensuring that you listen to the other person when it is their turn to speak. Not listening is an unmistakable sign of disrespect if you are talking over them or responding when you haven't listened to their argument fully. Although it can be difficult, when you are in an argument, you need to listen actively while the other person is speaking and not think about your next words. It would help if you also clarified what you don't understand to ensure a misunderstanding doesn't make the argument worse. 

 

It isn't always easy to keep an argument respectful. Still, if you resolve not to let the argument get personal, use the word "I" instead of "you," and listen while the other person is speaking, you will find that you can easily disagree with respect. So next time you feel the urge to argue, use these three tips to keep your argument respectful.