Don't Let Your Circumstances Dictate Your Self-Worth

Star Trek was a groundbreaking science fiction TV series of the 1960s. A matter transporter was one of the technological wonders the show employed in many episodes. An object or a person could be teleported from the Star Ship Enterprise to a transporter on board another spacecraft or a nearby planet.

 

Imagine that the fictitious transporter worked. You could teleport yourself from your current location to anywhere else on earth. You could leave any environment or situation in just a few seconds and transport yourself to a much more favorable location.

 

If you are familiar with the original Star Trek television series or the many TV and movie shows and films it spawned, you know how timely the transporter could be. Captain Kirk, Spock, Dr. McCoy, and others were often saved from imminent death when transported to a much safer and friendlier location.

 

Transporting Your Self-Worth

 

You have a virtual transporter in your mind. You can transport yourself to another reality whenever your experiences change. When things are going great, many people live in a high self-worth reality. When life gets tough, they shift their self-worth to a lower-quality reality. 

 

We often allow our perception of ourselves to change due to our experiences. We allow people, places, and things to change our feelings. If we already struggle with self-worth, it happens more often than not. It’s part of being human, a flawed human that we all are. That doesn’t make it right. It just means you need to be aware of the possibility of it happening.

 

Keep this in mind, your environment and your thoughts might change but it doesn’t change the unique individual you are. You are a good person soul deep. You are capable and worthy. So, wherever you go, no matter what external factors are involved, there you are.

 

There’s No Need to Shift Your Self-Worth

 

Feeling the need to flee doesn't happen to someone with a high level of self-worth. They recognize the person that they are inside no matter what external factors are happening around them. 

 

People with a great self-image and high self-esteem are comfortable in their skin. They don't change their opinion of who they are just because of the surrounding circumstances. This is good because our circumstances and experiences frequently change without us being able to stop them.

 

Value yourself. Embrace who you are, warts and all. Intimately get to know your strengths and weaknesses, your skills and abilities. Respect the fact that you are a unique individual that has never existed before you came along and will never exist after you are gone. That's reason enough to respect and love yourself greatly. 

 

Admire who you are. You were created uniquely and are valuable to the world just as you are. Don't let your present circumstances change the way you perceive yourself because they can change without any control on your part.

Breaking Bad Habits: A Practical Guide To Positive Change

Why is it so difficult to overcome bad habits when we know we may harm ourselves or others? For example, we know about the health risks associated with smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol excessively, and overeating. 

 

Our families, friends, and others are impacted by secondhand smoke and the effects of alcoholism. We want to give up our bad habits, but the short-term pleasure makes quitting or changing habits challenging. This article will explore the psychology that causes us to form habits and how to make positive changes to break bad habits.

 

About Habits

Our repetitive actions become habitual and are a normal part of the human state. Habits can be beneficial, such as taking a shower or exercising. On the other hand, regular use of illegal drugs, for example, can become a bad habit. Habits can also form when pleasurable things prompt the brain’s “reward” center, leading to unhealthy routines like gambling or overeating.

 

Eventually, the habit becomes an automatic behavior without consciously thinking about it, and it can be difficult to stop. Developing new habits is challenging since the brain retains automatic behavior. 

 

Still, you can eliminate bad habits with patience and commitment by trying the following practical strategies for positive change.

 

Identify Your Bad Habits and Triggers: List the habits you want to change to improve your well-being. Don’t try to change all your habits at once. Instead, choose the highest priority habit that you want to change and focus on it. This will increase your chances of success.

 

Think about what triggers the habit and explore options for avoiding it. For example, assume that you are stressed after work each day and find that drinking alcohol helps you to relax. However, you’ve gotten into the habit of drinking excessively and are concerned about your health. 

 

In that case, you can learn techniques such as meditation to help you relax. Ensure that you take short breaks during the workday to practice meditation. This will help you to cope with stress better. After work, when you feel the urge for a drink, substitute it with exercise, such as a brisk walk to help you unwind.

 

Your goal is to reduce or remove the trigger and substitute the bad habit with a good one.

 

Accept Discomfort: Changing habits is complex and can make you anxious and agitated. Recognize that these are normal feelings; they are temporary and will diminish with time. If you feel discomfort, do something that relaxes you; it’s a distraction and will help you to feel better. Consider going for a walk, reading, playing a game, or taking a short nap.

 

Adopt a Positive Mindset: We all have an inner voice and unconsciously have negative thoughts at times that are discouraging or detrimental to our well-being. You may think, “I can’t do this,” or “I’ll never kick this habit.” Be aware of these thoughts and replace them with positive self-talk such as “I can do this” or “I will do this.”

 

Be Kind to Yourself: You’re human; it’s essential to forgive yourself if you backslide while trying to break a habit. Give yourself credit for your efforts thus far. Rather than give up or put yourself down with negative self-talk, you can pick up where you left off and get back on track. Remember to be aware of scenarios that trigger the habit and either avoid or substitute the behavior with something positive.

 

Conclusion

When we repetitively practice behaviors, good or bad, those behaviors become habits. The habits that are bad for us are challenging to overcome. However, we can learn how to identify the triggers that make us indulge in our detrimental routines and then avoid the trigger or substitute it with positive behaviors such as exercise or enjoying a stroll in the park. 

 

Along the way, if we backslide, we must remain positive and persistent and keep trying. In the long run, by trying the preceding tips, you are taking a practical approach to making positive changes in your life.

References

https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2012/01/breaking-bad-habits

 

https://www.psychologicalscience.org/observer/breaking-bad-habits

 

https://knowablemagazine.org/content/article/mind/2021/the-science-habits

 

Self-Discovery 101: Uncovering Your True Self

Self-discovery is certainly an exciting journey, but it's also a long one. If you want to experience a profound exploration of self-transformation as you do so, you will need to prepare yourself for thorough introspection to develop a deep sense of self-awareness. Personal growth can result in a much more fulfilling life as you uncover your authentic self. Here, we explore the keys to uncovering your true self. 

 

Curiosity 

 

You can't embark on a journey of self-discovery without first embracing curiosity. More importantly, curiosity about you and your life. Be prepared to ask and answer questions about what you're passionate about, and what brings you joy, and open yourself to the idea of exploring all of the different parts of your desires, interests, and personality. 

 

Curiosity will be the spark that ignites this journey!

 

Mindfulness 

 

Mindfulness has a lot of benefits for a lot of different pursuits because it helps you root yourself in the present, and without judgment. Mindfulness allows you to observe emotions and thoughts without attaching emotion or judgment, which helps you deepen your self-awareness. What better space to practice self-reflection?

 

Values 

 

Your values and beliefs are a big part of who you are and they should be guiding your decisions, but only if it's serving you well. A lot of people get caught up chasing other people's values. So, it's worth sitting down to consider what you value most – whether it's honesty and integrity, family and friends, or material wealth. 

 

If you know, you know, and you can use that knowledge to further your true self. Another thing many people don't realize is that your values and beliefs change – so, what you valued and believed five years ago may be different from how you feel today. That's okay! You just need to have regular check-ins with yourself. 

 

Passions

 

Mindless activities are fine, they can form a positive part of your self-care practice. But, you should also engage in activities that you're truly passionate about, activities that fill you with a sense of fulfillment. It could be a cause, a hobby, or a creative pursuit. Explore your passions because they give you valuable insights into who you truly are. Time flies when you're having fun… so, what are you doing when time flies? 

 

Confront Fear 

 

You will never discover yourself if you aren't prepared to face your fears and challenge your limiting beliefs. Identify fear and examine those beliefs that aren't serving you well. This will help you break free from the chains trapping you. 

 

Journal 

 

A journal is an excellent self-reflection tool.  It's a safe space for you to track your thoughts and feelings, and note your experiences. You can look back on it to see your growth, look for patterns of behavior, and gain deeper insight into your true self. This private space gives you permission to express yourself fully without fear of judgment. 

 

Strengths and Weaknesses 

 

You can't know your true self without first identifying your strengths and weaknesses. As difficult as it might be, this should be an objective process. It's key to self-discovery. 

 

If you're struggling with this stage of the process, you can seek feedback from people you trust, people who you believe will be honest and forthright with you about the things you're great at and the things that you're maybe not so great at. 

 

Final Thoughts 

 

Self-discovery may be a long journey, but it's worth the effort. So, spark your curiosity, practice mindfulness, prepare for reflection, explore your passions, and confront your fears if you want to uncover your true self. 

 

When you open the door on this journey, you're unlocking a deep understanding of your true self, and delving into a more authentic life. It isn't a destination, but this continuous exploration will be fulfilling. 

 

Sailing Through Life: Letting Go And Trusting The Journey

Life can be difficult, and while a lot of people float through life, my wish for you is that you sail through it instead. There will be rough waters, of course, but you can batten down the hatches and navigate choppy water and the rest of the time, you can let go and trust the journey. 

 

So, before you hoist the sails to embark on your big adventure, let's talk about how important it is to embrace uncertainty and face the open sea. 

 

Learn Life's Lessons

 

One of the biggest lessons that sailing through life can teach you is found in the art of letting go. The first step in setting sail is releasing the anchor, you can't move forward without taking that step of letting go first. So, you too need to relinquish your fears and let go of attachments to start on your voyage. 

 

You have to loosen the grip on past traumas, release yourself from external expectations, and let go of the need for control. That is what is weighing you down, and it's holding you back from taking flight on the winds of change! 

 

It's important to understand that letting go isn't about abandoning your goals or ducking out on your responsibilities. Rather, it's about learning to let go of the burden that comes with your attempt to control the things you can't control. Holding onto those things is hindering your ability to grow and stunting your ability to adapt. 

 

Imagine, for a moment, a boat being navigated by a skilled captain. The captain will adjust the sails when the wind changes, which demonstrates their trust in their skills and the journey. 

 

You, too, can trust the process and make small tweaks as you move along, understanding that you can't control every aspect. To do that, however, you need to surrender to life's natural flow. That requires an understanding that while storms are inevitable, they are temporary. Whatever the storm, it is contributing to your spiritual and personal growth. 

 

The Beauty of Life 

 

The metaphor of life being a journey at sea goes far beyond navigating storms. The key is understanding that you can revel in the calm when the sea is serene. In the same way, you should relish life's joys when things are tranquil. 

 

You can recognize that change is inevitable, and you can understand that storms will likely arise, but you can embrace that change as a potential source of strength. When you learn to navigate every storm with resilience, you dig deep to take advantage of your inner capabilities. Every challenge delivers an opportunity to evolve. 

 

You have the skills you need to navigate the biggest obstacles in life, and that's good – but you need to let go of trying to control everything and learn how to sail through the easy bits to enjoy life to its fullest. 

 

Final Thoughts 

 

Sailing through life is simply a metaphor to highlight your need to let go and trust the journey. On larger ships, a crew mans the ship and they have to work together to get the job done. A bit like life, your support network and connections will help you thrive if you trust them. You don't need to be a solitary captain navigating your small boat on raging seas – we're all connected. 

 

As you navigate the seat of life, you will encounter turbulent waves, but there's also a lot of calm water. So, let go of toxic attachments, embrace change, trust the process, and steer your life toward growth and fulfillment. There is strength in letting go, not weakness. So, trust the journey and follow the natural ebbs and flows of life – your experience will be profound, but only if you let go, trust, and enjoy the journey. 

 

Breaking The Chains: The Power Of Releasing Your Past

As important as the past is for learning lessons and remembering successes, it's equally important that you don't let the past keep you chained there. 

 

Like the stereotypical high school jock who perpetually lives in the past because those were the best days of his life. Or the woman who can't build healthy relationships because never recovered from her college boyfriend's infidelity. 

 

The negative parts of our past have a way of clinging on, wrapping its tendrils around you and despite your attempts at remaining in the present, the chains of the past remain wrapped tight. You carry the weight of those chains into every experience, and whether it's negative or positive, it has a powerful impact on your present life. There can be great power in releasing your past and breaking those chains. 

 

Moving On

 

One of the greatest challenges people face is breaking free from the chains of their past. It could be a past mistake, a stinging heartbreak, or trauma from a difficult experience; all of your life experiences impact your emotional and mental well-being. 

 

Dwelling on the past, however, will only keep you anchored to a period of time that you should have left behind. That time no longer exists, yet it's rooting you there and preventing you from living in the here and now. 

 

The first step to breaking those chains is acknowledging your past and accepting it. It's an essential part of the process, you have to confront the unresolved emotions and pain that you've buried deep, which will require self-reflection and a whole lot of courage. By facing your past head-on, you remove the power it holds over your present moment and the future. 

 

Forgiveness is another step necessary to break those chains. Whether it's forgiving yourself or someone else, a lot of people hold onto grudges over things that happened. It's important to remember that forgiveness doesn't mean that you forget what happened. 

 

If someone hurt you or wronged you, forgiving them isn't forgetting the harm they caused you. It doesn't mean making up and being friends either. It's a conscious decision to let go of the painful emotions that have lingered since the experience. Forgiveness isn't for them, it's for you. 

 

The Power 

 

Perhaps one of the most vital aspects of breaking free from the past's chains is self-compassion. 

 

Self-compassion simply means that you treat yourself with the same understanding and kindness you extend to your closest friends. You treat them with care, and you offer them a gentle response, but you are your own worst enemy – your harshest critic. You hold yourself to an impossible standard and when you slip up, you give yourself merry hell. Self-compassion provides a nurturing environment to foster healing and growth. 

 

Mindfulness is another powerful tool for breaking the chains of your past. 

 

Mindfulness is all about focusing on the present moment, observing your thoughts without judgment, and acknowledging your feelings without opinion. Mindfulness practices like deep breathing, meditation, and body scanning help you develop the ability to let go of the past, dismiss intrusive thoughts, and focus on the beauty of the moment. 

 

An essential part of personal development as a whole, and particularly breaking chains, is setting boundaries. Boundaries protect you from negative behaviors, and repeating patterns, and help you use your time and energy more wisely. Boundaries help you create space for change and growth. 

 

Final Thoughts 

 

While the process of breaking the chains of your past can be difficult, it is possible. Above, you have a step-by-step process to do just that. It will take some time, but if you're committed to the process, you will need a combination of self-awareness and forgiveness, self-compassion, and mindfulness, as well as boundary-setting. 

 

Work on establishing a forward-focused mindset because this journey will require resilience and dedication. In return, you will benefit on a profound level. Your life will be free from the burdens of the past and filled with an endless number of possibilities. As you let go of the past, you open yourself to growth, healing, and the recognition of your potential. 

 

How Can I Feel More Comfortable With Change?

Change can be difficult to deal with, mainly because it is uncomfortable. However, change is an essential part of life. If you can't deal with change, you will never move forward or grow as a person. Below are some ways to help yourself be more comfortable with any changes that are coming your way. 

 

Recognize When Change is Coming

 

Sometimes, change is so uncomfortable because you weren't expecting it. This is why you should do your best to recognize when change is coming and tell yourself in advance. For example, maybe your boss just put in her two weeks' notice. This means that there will be a new boss in two weeks, who will probably want to change a few things around the office. Let yourself know this and go over the scenario in your mind so the change won’t seem as shocking when it does come about. 

 

Write Down Your Fears

 

Change is also uncomfortable because it often digs up some of your deepest fears. Think about the above example. You could be worried that a new boss will demote or fire you. If this is the case, write these fears down. Writing your fears down, no matter what they are, will help you be less afraid and better prepared when (and if) you need to face them at some point. 

 

Ask For Help

 

Are you struggling with a certain change? Ask for help. This can be in the form of mental help from a health professional, or maybe even just asking if your friend will allow you to vent with them for a little bit. Everyone has gone through changes at some point in their life and knows how they are feeling. So know that you never have to face change alone.

 

Look For the Positives

 

All of this fear and discomfort comes from the negative side of change. Remember, change isn't negative. Change is actually positive. This means you need to do all that you can to see the positive side of change. So maybe your boss is leaving, but maybe this means you will finally get a promotion or that you will have a great time working for someone new. No matter the change in your life, there is always a positive side!

 

Overall, change is a crucial part of life, but knowing this doesn't make it any less difficult to go through. When you are struggling to be comfortable with change, try preparing yourself in advance, writing down your fears, and asking for help if you need it. Don't forget to always look at the positive side of change so that you can forget the negatives. 

 

Who Gets Burnout? Are You at Risk?

You may not be suffering from any chronic stress right now. You experience stress but assume it's at the same level as most people, and you handle it easily. What you need to ask yourself is this.

 

Are the problems in your life putting you at risk of going from a normal stress level to full-blown burnout?

 

Burnout and stress are related. Chronic stress, always having to deal with stressful situations and problems, can lead to burnout. On the other hand, regular doses of stress are actually good for you.

 

It's a way your body protects you. The stress response is tied to your fight-or-flight instinct. All your senses become fully aware if you must battle a threat or run in the opposite direction very quickly.

 

Burnout results from experiencing that situation constantly. Your mind, body, and/or emotions are relentlessly being hammered to the point that they give up. 

 

They simply can't take anymore. Even the strongest-willed person can suffer seriously from an endless barrage of stress to the point that some part of you shuts down.

 

Am I a Candidate for Burnout?

 

First, you need to ask yourself if you love your job. If you do, you likely don't have an issue. When you wake each morning and can't wait to get to work, your stress isn't unbearable. It's a sign that no chronic stress awaits you to clock in and get to work.

 

What do you do most of the time if you don't work? Does that cause you a lot of stress? Again, if stress isn't a constant companion, you probably don't have to worry.

 

Burnout comes from a consistent and relentless delivery of stress. 

 

Whether it's on the job, at home, or anywhere else, it's stress that you can't escape. It's right in your face and gets you to the point where you feel like you will explode.

 

Some jobs are more stressful than others. Yahoo Finance reports that the following occupations are more likely to lead to burnout than others.

 

·      Retail

·      Surgeon

·      Fast food worker

·      Social worker

·      Air traffic controller

·      Construction worker

·      Teacher

·      Nurse

·      Certified public accountant

·      Firefighter

·      Emergency medical technician

 

If you don't work any of those jobs, that doesn't mean you're immune to burnout. Frequently experiencing stress is never a good thing. Consult a mental health professional if you feel stress is too big of a part of your life.

 

6 Benefits to Having an Unwavering Belief In Yourself

Every day we make dozens of decisions. Our whole day is nothing more than a series of actions, one after another. We're used to it because this is part of what it means to be an adult, right?

 

The thing is, sometimes, we become worn down by the challenges of life. We miss the mark and start to doubt ourselves. Life becomes more difficult. 

 

What does this have to do with the decisions we make or the actions we take? Simple. When you start faltering, you lose your belief in yourself. Everything becomes a little harder. 

 

Now consider what it would be like to simplify things again. By believing in yourself, amazing things happen.

 

You Show Yourself Respect

 

When you doubt yourself, you run yourself down. You're saying you're not good enough or smart enough to know what you're doing when in truth, you are. You wouldn't allow someone to do this to your best friend. Why would you do it to yourself? Instead, by choosing confidence, you're also choosing to acknowledge just how awesome you are.

 

You Learn About Yourself

 

We all have a lot of knowledge we're not even aware we possess. This knowledge is an accumulation of wisdom we've collected in our lives that we tap into when making decisions. When you trust your instincts, you discover just how much you truly do know.

 

You Push Yourself

 

Sure, some decisions are easy. History tells us exactly what to expect when we make them. But when you take a leap of faith into unwavering self-confidence, you're also challenging yourself to see how much you truly know and just how right you can be. It is a pretty powerful feeling.

 

You Gain More

 

Nothing is ever gained by standing still. When you hesitate because of self-doubt, you're going to miss all kinds of possibilities. Lack of confidence keeps us from trying new things. After all, if there's no chance of success, why even try? But confidence knows you've got what it takes to seize an opportunity when you see it.

 

You Learn Tenacity

 

When you don't trust yourself, you tend to avoid the hard decisions entirely, stalling out any progress in your life. By choosing to believe in yourself, you keep going, learning how to hang in there during the rough stuff. This is also where you achieve real growth as an individual.

 

You Feel Motivated

 

When you're down on yourself, it's easy to think there's no point in even trying. Self-doubt will drop you right into depression if you're not careful. But unwavering self-belief creates optimism. The whole world looks brighter, and you can't wait to be part of it because you know you have what it takes to succeed there.

 

The Science Of Happiness: Strategies For A Joyful Life

Life can get messy and unpredictable sometimes and some things are just out of our control. The way we react to certain triggers and situations and how we show up in life determine how joyful or miserable our lives can turn out to be. It takes intentional action to make life joyful and live a happy life. 

 

As the famous quote goes, “It’s not what happens to you, it’s how you react to it that matters.” - Epictetus

 

Below are some strategies for living a joyful life: 

 

Find and Prioritize Your Purpose

 

If you want to live a joyful and fulfilled life, finding a purpose is key. Some people may find purpose in their work and job, but you can also find it outside of paid work, such as doing something for the good of the community or society.

 

Look inward and think about something that you feel passionate about, that gives back to the world, that can bring in some income, and that you are good at. This is most likely to be your calling. When you find and prioritize your purpose, you have something to look forward to and wake up to every morning. It gives you a sense of purpose and joy when you fulfill your purpose, leading to a happy and satisfied life. 

 

Nurture Relationships

 

When we look at the centenarians from the Blue Zones, we see that they highly prioritize and nurture their social relationships with friends and family. They live a simple life where one of their focuses is to build and nurture supportive relationships. 

 

Even at 90 years old, these people are seen to be fit, healthy, and happy free of any chronic diseases due to their lifestyle and familial support. Therefore, it is important to learn a lesson from the people of the Blue Zones that nurturing healthy relationship has a positive impact on living a happy life. We all need support in our lives, a shoulder to cry on, and like-minded friends to share the joys of life with. 

 

Let Go of Things that No Longer Serve Us

 

Life is full of different phases and each phase requires a different and more evolved version of you. To live a joyful life, learn to let go of things, people, situations, and memories that no longer serve you, and be clear on who and what deserves to move forward into the next season of your life. 

 

This can help you let go and embrace release, leading to a happier life. To live more joyfully, learn to let go of perfectionism and how you think life ‘should be’ or what ‘could have been.’ Embrace the present moment fully and declutter your life of habits, negative mindsets, toxic relationships, and feelings of regret, guilt, or shame from the past. Learn to let go of any emotional baggage that may deter you from living a joyful life. 

 

Be Kind and Compassionate to Yourself

 

Self-care is an integral part of living a happier life. This can simply mean being kind and compassionate to yourself by not talking negatively to or about yourself. It could also mean practicing self-care like taking time out of work to rest and wind down instead of overworking yourself, focusing on improving your mental and emotional well-being, taking care of your body, and whatever else you may prefer as self-care. 

 

To be happier, you should ditch the negative self-talk, rewire, and reframe your mindset to be more kind to yourself, and see how your life shifts from misery to joy. 

 

Joy can look different to every person. What you perceive as joy may not be the same version for someone else. Some may find joy in nurturing relationships while others may prefer some ‘me time’ with themselves in solitude. 

 

It is important to discover your version of joy to live a happier life. Lastly, remember to fill your cup first so that you can pour it into others. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so find your purpose, do activities that enrich your life, let go easily, lean on others, and laugh more to live a joyful life.