Don't Let Your Circumstances Dictate Your Self-Worth

Star Trek was a groundbreaking science fiction TV series of the 1960s. A matter transporter was one of the technological wonders the show employed in many episodes. An object or a person could be teleported from the Star Ship Enterprise to a transporter on board another spacecraft or a nearby planet.

 

Imagine that the fictitious transporter worked. You could teleport yourself from your current location to anywhere else on earth. You could leave any environment or situation in just a few seconds and transport yourself to a much more favorable location.

 

If you are familiar with the original Star Trek television series or the many TV and movie shows and films it spawned, you know how timely the transporter could be. Captain Kirk, Spock, Dr. McCoy, and others were often saved from imminent death when transported to a much safer and friendlier location.

 

Transporting Your Self-Worth

 

You have a virtual transporter in your mind. You can transport yourself to another reality whenever your experiences change. When things are going great, many people live in a high self-worth reality. When life gets tough, they shift their self-worth to a lower-quality reality. 

 

We often allow our perception of ourselves to change due to our experiences. We allow people, places, and things to change our feelings. If we already struggle with self-worth, it happens more often than not. It’s part of being human, a flawed human that we all are. That doesn’t make it right. It just means you need to be aware of the possibility of it happening.

 

Keep this in mind, your environment and your thoughts might change but it doesn’t change the unique individual you are. You are a good person soul deep. You are capable and worthy. So, wherever you go, no matter what external factors are involved, there you are.

 

There’s No Need to Shift Your Self-Worth

 

Feeling the need to flee doesn't happen to someone with a high level of self-worth. They recognize the person that they are inside no matter what external factors are happening around them. 

 

People with a great self-image and high self-esteem are comfortable in their skin. They don't change their opinion of who they are just because of the surrounding circumstances. This is good because our circumstances and experiences frequently change without us being able to stop them.

 

Value yourself. Embrace who you are, warts and all. Intimately get to know your strengths and weaknesses, your skills and abilities. Respect the fact that you are a unique individual that has never existed before you came along and will never exist after you are gone. That's reason enough to respect and love yourself greatly. 

 

Admire who you are. You were created uniquely and are valuable to the world just as you are. Don't let your present circumstances change the way you perceive yourself because they can change without any control on your part.

Give Yourself Permission For Self-Care

The practice of self-care means taking care of your physical and mental health and being aware that you must take care of yourself as the highest priority. Self-care increases stamina, reduces stress, and decreases the risk of illness, so we must treat ourselves as number one to thrive and be strong.

 

Still, we may think putting ourselves first is selfish or egotistical. Others are challenged with low self-esteem, making them feel like they don’t deserve to be first. Some people think they must do everything for everybody and will put aside their goals to assist others. These scenarios impact our self-esteem, keep us from pursuing our goals, and foster self-care neglect.

 

We must understand that if we don’t care for ourselves, we won’t be able to help anyone else, we may feel stressed, and our health suffers. When our mental or physical health is poor, we lose motivation and energy, and our quality-of-life decreases.

 

How can we treat ourselves compassionately and make self-care a part of our daily routine? 

 

About Self-Care

 

The World Health Organization explains that self-care is “the ability of individuals, families, and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a health worker.”

 

The National Library of Medicine published a study on the role of self-care related to stress and mental well-being during the COVID-19 pandemic. A tool, the Self-Care Activities Screening Scale (SASS-14), was used to evaluate the study participants. Four main areas were considered:

 

• Health consciousness

• Nutrition and physical activity

• Sleep quality

• Interpersonal and intrapersonal coping strategies

 

The result of the study is that self-care significantly improves our well-being. However, the higher a person’s perceived stress level, the more challenging it is to practice self-care.

 

Self-Care Basics

 

Reduction of perceived stress is essential for self-care. The following are basic strategies to help you cope with stress and lead you to a healthy lifestyle.

 

Embrace Healthy Foods: Nutritious meals can improve your energy and brain power. Healthy foods include fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean meats, fish and seafood, nuts and seeds, beans, low-fat dairy products, and unsaturated oils, such as olive oil. Avoid fried foods, salt, sugar, fast foods, cakes and pies, and too much caffeine. 

 

Sleep Well: The Sleep Health Foundation recommends that adults aged 18-64 sleep 7 - 9 hours and adults over 64 sleep 7 – 8 hours nightly. Avoid actions that might keep you awake at night, such as caffeine in the afternoon, using electronics before bedtime, and taking long naps during the day. You can foster a good night’s sleep by exercising during the day, going to sleep and waking up at the same time daily, and ensuring that your bedroom is quiet. 

 

Every Workout Counts: Exercise helps to relieve stress and make you stronger mentally and physically. Choose an activity that you enjoy, such as a brisk walk, and strive to exercise at least 30 minutes daily.

 

Stay Connected: Among many benefits, having good friends can relieve stress and promote happiness. The Mayo Clinic reports that friends help you cope with traumas, improve self-confidence, and reduce your risk of health problems.

 

Time Management and Boundaries: The night before, create a to-do list for the next day and prioritize each item. This “roadmap” for the day will help you focus on the tasks that must be completed. Work through your goals and tasks in priority order. Also, consider setting boundaries to prevent interruptions to your plan. For example, if you block out 3 hours to focus on a task, let those who need to know that you aren’t available during that time. 

 

Conclusion

Taking care of yourself is essential to reduce stress and reap the benefits of good health and happiness. In our busy lives, we may feel we don’t have time for self-care, thus impacting our health and energy and limiting our capacity to help others. Remember that you are not being selfish by treating yourself as number one and setting boundaries is not rude. These are necessary concepts to help you cope with stress and boost your well-being.

 

References

 

https://www.who.int/health-topics/self-care#tab=tab_1

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8678542/

 

https://www.sleephealthfoundation.org.au/sleep-topics/how-much-sleep-do-you-really-need

 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/friendships/art-20044860

 

Breaking Bad Habits: A Practical Guide To Positive Change

Why is it so difficult to overcome bad habits when we know we may harm ourselves or others? For example, we know about the health risks associated with smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol excessively, and overeating. 

 

Our families, friends, and others are impacted by secondhand smoke and the effects of alcoholism. We want to give up our bad habits, but the short-term pleasure makes quitting or changing habits challenging. This article will explore the psychology that causes us to form habits and how to make positive changes to break bad habits.

 

About Habits

Our repetitive actions become habitual and are a normal part of the human state. Habits can be beneficial, such as taking a shower or exercising. On the other hand, regular use of illegal drugs, for example, can become a bad habit. Habits can also form when pleasurable things prompt the brain’s “reward” center, leading to unhealthy routines like gambling or overeating.

 

Eventually, the habit becomes an automatic behavior without consciously thinking about it, and it can be difficult to stop. Developing new habits is challenging since the brain retains automatic behavior. 

 

Still, you can eliminate bad habits with patience and commitment by trying the following practical strategies for positive change.

 

Identify Your Bad Habits and Triggers: List the habits you want to change to improve your well-being. Don’t try to change all your habits at once. Instead, choose the highest priority habit that you want to change and focus on it. This will increase your chances of success.

 

Think about what triggers the habit and explore options for avoiding it. For example, assume that you are stressed after work each day and find that drinking alcohol helps you to relax. However, you’ve gotten into the habit of drinking excessively and are concerned about your health. 

 

In that case, you can learn techniques such as meditation to help you relax. Ensure that you take short breaks during the workday to practice meditation. This will help you to cope with stress better. After work, when you feel the urge for a drink, substitute it with exercise, such as a brisk walk to help you unwind.

 

Your goal is to reduce or remove the trigger and substitute the bad habit with a good one.

 

Accept Discomfort: Changing habits is complex and can make you anxious and agitated. Recognize that these are normal feelings; they are temporary and will diminish with time. If you feel discomfort, do something that relaxes you; it’s a distraction and will help you to feel better. Consider going for a walk, reading, playing a game, or taking a short nap.

 

Adopt a Positive Mindset: We all have an inner voice and unconsciously have negative thoughts at times that are discouraging or detrimental to our well-being. You may think, “I can’t do this,” or “I’ll never kick this habit.” Be aware of these thoughts and replace them with positive self-talk such as “I can do this” or “I will do this.”

 

Be Kind to Yourself: You’re human; it’s essential to forgive yourself if you backslide while trying to break a habit. Give yourself credit for your efforts thus far. Rather than give up or put yourself down with negative self-talk, you can pick up where you left off and get back on track. Remember to be aware of scenarios that trigger the habit and either avoid or substitute the behavior with something positive.

 

Conclusion

When we repetitively practice behaviors, good or bad, those behaviors become habits. The habits that are bad for us are challenging to overcome. However, we can learn how to identify the triggers that make us indulge in our detrimental routines and then avoid the trigger or substitute it with positive behaviors such as exercise or enjoying a stroll in the park. 

 

Along the way, if we backslide, we must remain positive and persistent and keep trying. In the long run, by trying the preceding tips, you are taking a practical approach to making positive changes in your life.

References

https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2012/01/breaking-bad-habits

 

https://www.psychologicalscience.org/observer/breaking-bad-habits

 

https://knowablemagazine.org/content/article/mind/2021/the-science-habits

 

How To Believe In Your Dreams And Make Them Happen

“Reach high, for stars lie hidden in you. 

Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.”

- Rabindranath Tagore

 

Can you really believe in your dreams? Are they attainable? Do you pursue them actively, every day? If you don’t, then your dreams will only be dreams. They are more like fantasies if you don’t invest in them and act on them. 

 

Think about claiming your dreams and making them happen. This leads like a path to your life’s purpose, and the life you were intended to live. 

 

Here are some valuable steps to believe in your dreams and make them happen:

 

Don’t allow fear to overcome your dreams. 

 

Believing in your personal dreams can be tied up in your fears. Fear can hog-tie even the most noble dreams, so they won’t grow. Fear is sneaky, but so overpowering. 

 

Fear will make you think you can’t make your dreams happen. It makes you feel that you’re not young enough, or smart enough or rich enough, to make them a reality. Why is that? 

 

It’s your ingrained fear of failing that does it. This overpowers any desire or will to try to reach for your dreams. Rather than pursuing your dreams, you believe, falsely, that your dreams can never come true. You’ll never know if you could have succeeded or not. If fear wins you over, your dreams will die. 

 

Identify your dreams.

 

You may have many dreams, and some of them may change, over time. They can only come true if you truly care about them. Work on your dreams now, instead of waiting for the “best” time or situation. 

 

If you have dreams that have not yet come true, pick one now. Dedicate yourself and make it happen. Don’t worry about what other people say, and don’t make any more excuses. Either that, or perhaps this wasn’t a true dream for you from the start. Look for another from your list and go after that dream. 

 

Believe fully in your dreams. 

 

Dreams are not only powerful thoughts. They also push you to do or be something. If you are daring enough to dream, you should also hold the courage to believe in those dreams. Dreams allow you freedom to change fantasy to reality. 

 

Dreams are easier to dream than they are to make happen. If you do something you love and shoot for what you want, this is more satisfactory and simpler than holding dreams in your heart but not acting on them. Take the chance and make a dream happen in your life.  

 

Pursue your dreams. 

 

Believing in your dreams is wonderful, but only if you pursue them. In order to do that, you must:

 

1. Set goals that are realistic. 

 

Set attainable goals, but also challenge yourself to make them happen. Start with smaller goals and work your way through to larger ones. Break dreams into steps that are manageable, and that you’ll be able to complete. 

 

2. Develop a more positive attitude.

 

Believe in yourself and remain positive. Keep your motivation strong, since pursuing dreams may be tough. Surround yourself with family and friends who uphold and support you, to help keep you on the right track. 

 

3. Take definite action.

 

Don’t wait for something to happen – you need to make it happen yourself. Take steps, even if they’re small, towards your dreams. The more you act with purpose, the closer you will be to making your dreams happen. 

 

4. Persevere even if you have setbacks.

 

As with any journey, there are bumps in your path. If you come up against obstacles and they knock you back, get up and move on. When you pursue your dreams, the race is not a sprint but a marathon. Remain focused and don’t give up. 

 

Conclusion

 

Believing in your dreams and making them happen does take effort, but it is possible, as long as you’ve set your mind to it. Take smaller steps and remain positive, and you will be able to overcome any difficulties you encounter. Start pursuing your dreams today!

 

“Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.” 
- Harriet Tubman

 

10 Thoughtful Ways To Show Others They Matter To You

There is something special about feeling needed by friends and family or just being of importance to someone. These feelings help you to build your self-confidence and fortify your happiness. 

 

They can lead you to the understanding of where you fit in “the big picture,” giving your life meaning. You can show others how to feel this way, as well, by showing them that they matter to you. 

 

Here are 10 thoughtful ways you can show others that they truly matter to you:

 

Give them a hug. 

 

Ah, hugs, those simple embraces may be all someone needs to feel healing power and your appreciation for them. Hugging also creates a connection between you and others and a sense of safety, important in any stage of your life. 

 

Actively listen with your whole body, not just your ears. 

 

Pay attention to your body language when you are listening to someone close, to show them that how they feel is important to you. When you speak face to face, maintain eye contact. If the topic is positive or light, a smile is helpful, too. 

Celebrate their successes with them. 

 

When you acknowledge someone’s accomplishments, it will boost their sense of self-esteem, and allow them to feel more important. When a friend achieves something, they have worked diligently for, celebrate it with them and recognize their efforts. Celebrating others’ successes also creates a healthy, positive environment that is beneficial to all involved. 

 

Make the time for private conversations with just the two of you. 

 

Making time in your day for one-on-one interactions truly shows that they matter to you. You dedicate them individualized attention, allowing them to understand they are a priority in your eyes. 

 

These private one-on-ones could include:

 

• Going for a walk in nature together

• Scheduling a coffee or dinner together

• Just having a private, uninterrupted conversation 

 

Focused time like this will allow you to form deeper connections. It also makes the other person feel important, valued, and respected. 

 

Let them know that you believe in them. 

 

When you believe in other people, encourage them to carry that belief themselves. This helps them to envision future successes, stretch their thinking and throw open the door to their own potential. Positive words used will infect others with enthusiasm and energy. Avoid cynical words, which suck their energy and plague them with less belief in themselves.

 

Offer them hope. 

 

At each moment of every day, you can either make the world better or worse. Your thoughts spread out and are contagious, so you want them to be positive. You have it in you to help lift others up or bring them down. Interactions with others should provide a spark of hope and encouragement, for a better day or possibly a better life. 

 

Send them motivational quotes.

 

Passing on words of motivation can refresh others’ perspectives on their situations. Each person will interpret experiences and information in their own way. Sending positive, encouraging quotes helps to establish positivity and connectedness. 

 

Respect their space when they need it.

 

Respect others’ need for space when it occurs. If someone you know and feel close to is going through a trying life event or a very busy time, maintaining healthy boundaries can let them know that their feelings are important to you. 

 

Let them know what you have learned from them.

 

When you tell your family, friends, or co-workers what you have learned from them, it validates them. This could include skills like:

 

• Active listening

• Cooking

• Being a true friend

 

Letting people know what they have taught us tells them that we have heard them, and we place importance on what they say. 

 

Send them snail mail cards or letters.

 

With everything being sent electronically today, sending your friends snail mail letters or cards can show them your appreciation and love in what is now a rather unique way. You can send greeting cards that are blank inside and fill them with your own words or send a handmade postcard or everyday card. It only takes a few words to let people know that they matter to you. 

 

Conclusion

 

There’s no time like now to show others that they matter to you. Even though you may be in touch with them frequently through email, etc., they will appreciate you reminding them that you are there for them physically, as well. Take a little time and show others just how much they mean to you. 

 

The Influence Of Positivity: Fostering Optimism In Challenging Times

Just when we are sailing smoothly through life, something unexpected comes along and throws us into a downward spiral. Terrible accidents, job loss, illness, the challenges of aging, or the loss of a loved one all can hit us hard personally. On a broader scope, the age in which we live has more violent crime, unemployment, social and political unrest, and economic hardships, draining our ability to cope. 

 

However, even in distressing circumstances, you can learn to approach life with optimism. Science has shown that people tend to bounce back when faced with significant life stressors.

 

The Difference Between Positivity and Optimism

Oxford Languages defines optimism as “Hopefulness and confidence about the future or the successful outcome of something.” In contrast, positivity is “The quality, character, or fact of being positive.”

 

In other words, optimism is anticipating positive outcomes in the future, whereas positivity is how we react to situations. An optimistic outlook helps us to foster positivity.

 

The Importance and Benefits of Optimism

Multiple studies were conducted to evaluate the links between optimism and psychological coping. The broaden-and-build theory (Fredrickson, 1998, 2001) found that optimistic feelings are helpful. "Experiences of positive emotions during times of stress prompt individuals to pursue novel and creative thoughts and actions.” 

 

Research by Johns Hopkins expert Lisa R. Yanek, M.P.H., and her colleagues found that people prone to heart disease who had an optimistic viewpoint were “13% less likely than their negative counterparts to have a heart attack or other coronary event.”

 

There are many other benefits to being optimistic, including:

 

• Reduced Risk of Depression: Studies show that positive people have better mental health, lowering the risk and severity of depression.

• Healthier Lifestyle: Optimistic people typically make healthy choices such as eating nutritious foods, exercising, and getting sufficient sleep.

• Longer Lifespan: Those who are optimistic tend to have good health and live longer than pessimistic people.

• Better Coping: Optimistic people handle stress better and recognize that hardships are only temporary.

 

How Do I Become More Optimistic?

Adjust Your Mindset

 

A mindset is how people perceive themselves and their beliefs, contributing to their attitudes and behavior. “By understanding, adapting and shifting your mindset, you can improve your health, decrease your stress and become more resilient to life’s challenges.” You can learn to shift your mindset by practicing positive self-talk and daily positive affirmations.

 

• Positive Self-Talk: Self-talk is the inner discussion or thoughts we all have; our thoughts can be positive or negative. As humans, when faced with hardships, we tend to blame ourselves. For example, if you were laid off from work, you might think, “What did I do wrong?” or “I really messed up.” Instead, replace the negative thoughts with optimistic ones, such as “I have the skills to find an exciting new career.”

• Daily Positive Affirmations: Improve your self-esteem and positivity by practicing daily affirmations, which are things we say to ourselves to acknowledge our self-worth, such as: "I choose to be happy today." or "I am optimistic."

 

Socialize with Positive People

 

When you interact with optimistic people, you tend to become more optimistic. You can learn from other people and have a great support system. You can meet people by taking a class, joining a group or club, attending church, or volunteering.

 

• Practice Acceptance: Experiencing negative and positive emotions is part of life. Accepting and valuing everything that happens is essential as it will improve your coping ability during difficult times. An optimistic person will look at challenging times as lessons learned for the future.

 

Live a Healthy Lifestyle

 

Strive to eat unprocessed, nutritious foods such as fruits and vegetables, lean proteins, whole grains, and fish. Exercise for at least 30 minutes daily to reduce stress, improve strength, and lift your mood. Choose a form of exercise you enjoy, such as walking or riding a bicycle.

 

Laughter is Good Medicine

 

Laughter increases your oxygen-rich air intake, stimulating organs such as the heart and lungs. It releases endorphins, a “feel-good” hormone. Indulge in fun activities that make you laugh, and always try to find the humor in things.

 

Conclusion

Optimism is important for our mental and physical health and well-being. Being positive can reduce the risk of depression, improve our coping abilities, and contribute to a longer lifespan. Optimism is essential for our personal growth. When we are optimistic, we approach life’s challenging times with positivity and confidence.

 

References

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3132556/

 

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/profiles/details/lisa-yanek 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/11/cheerful-heart-attack-risk-happy-well-being_n_3575548.html 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2894461/ 

https://news.stanford.edu/report/2021/09/15/mindsets-clearing-lens-life/ 

https://hbsp.harvard.edu/inspiring-minds/how-to-stay-optimistic-when-so-much-is-still-unclear 

https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_to_prime_your_mind_for_optimism 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950

https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/self-talk 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-relief/art-20044456 

Mindful Living: The Path To A More Fulfilling Life

Mindfulness is not an out-of-reach foreign concept that is difficult to add to your everyday life. It’s actually quite the opposite. Mindfulness is a meditation technique that has many benefits and is very simple to use. Here we talk about what mindfulness and its benefits are as well as ways to include it in your daily living.

 

What is Mindful Living?

 

Mindful living simply means incorporating the practice of mindfulness into your everyday life. As a beginner, you’ll need to make a conscious effort to practice mindfulness as you go about your day. Once you hone your skills, you’ll find yourself engaging in mindfulness automatically as you complete your daily tasks.

 

Mindfulness is a mental state in which you are fully aware of the present moment. You engage with your five physical senses and free thoughts. You allow yourself to experience the moment from an objective perspective. In mindfulness, it’s important to refrain from viewing experiences as “good” or “bad.”

 

How Is Mindful Living Beneficial?

 

Mindful living has benefits that reach every core life area, including mental health, physical health, social relationships, employment, recreation, etc. Here are just a few of the benefits that mindful living provides:

 

• Less rumination on undesired thoughts

• Stress reduction

• Better cognitive function

• Less emotional reactivity

• Higher satisfaction with relationships

• Better mental health

• Stronger immune function

 

How to Live Mindfully

 

There are many ways to introduce mindfulness into your daily life. It is a form of meditation as well as a mindset. First, you can start by scheduling a structured mindfulness session into each day. Ten-minute sessions are a good starting point. You can add them to your wake up or bedtime routine so that they’re easy to structure into your day. Here are some ways to practice mindfulness during these sessions:

 

• Get yourself into a comfortable position within a quiet and calm environment.

• Starting at either end of your body, gradually tense and relax your muscles and joints. Pay attention to the physical sensations as you do so.

• Take slow, deep breaths. Count how many you take and how long they last. Feel and visualize the air working through your respiratory system.

• Allow yourself to have thoughts of positive messages.

• Repeat encouraging mantras aloud.

• Listen to a guided meditation.

• Once you get better at these techniques, you can begin to practice them in a less structured way. Here are some ways to engage in mindfulness throughout your day:

• Practice mindfulness when you get a small break in your day, such as at work or while sitting at a red light in traffic.

• Journal at the end of each day to recap your experiences and note what you are grateful for that day.

• Create a positive affirmation jar and start your day by reading a slip out of the jar.

• Take inventory of your five physical senses as you complete daily activities, such as walking, driving, eating, hygiene tasks, and recreational activities.

• Focus on a single task at a time. For example, instead of listening to music while making dinner, prepare the meal without additional stimuli. You can feel the ingredients in your hands, hear the sound of chopping, smell the food cooking, see the variety of colors in the ingredients, and taste test the meal as you’re preparing it.

• Participate in creative recreational activities, such as coloring, sewing, sculpting, etc.

• Look at an object for a few minutes to notice details you’ve missed in the past.

• Actively listen in conversations with others.

• Practice empathy. Imagine what others may be experiencing and why they’re acting the way they are.

 

Think about what you will say before you say. Remember that it’s okay to take a pause in conversation if needed.

 

Source Links

 

https://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/07-08/ce-corner

 

https://www.healthline.com/health/mind-body/mindfulness-activities

 

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/320392

  

https://www.mindful.org/what-is-mindfulness/