Learn How to Trust Yourself from Others

Have you ever observed people who you felt were confident? They know what to do in most situations. Even when they don’t, they know how to find the answers. They never let problems get in their way. They always know how to talk to people. Their confidence is their power.

 

It’s likely these confident people trust themselves. It is impossible to have confidence when you don’t trust yourself. The confidence comes from an internal trust. It makes sense when you think about it.

 

If you don’t know too many people who are confident, try to learn about successful people. One great way to do this is to check out TED Talks. If you are not familiar with these, TED stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design. It’s an organization that exists to spread ideas usually in video form. You can find many of these talks on YouTube.com. Just search for TED Talks. 

 

Many of these videos are short but with high impact. It’s unlikely you will find speakers that don’t have confidence. You can observe the speakers in the video and see how they speak. Also, observe their body language. Do they smile a lot? How do they engage with the audience?

 

Another source to draw inspiration is Amazon books. Read biographies of successful people. It’s a bit more difficult to find stories about confidence when reading through the biographies. That is because their stories may not be specifically about confidence. But, it usually resonates through the story. If nothing else, you will pick up on some inspiration from other areas along with confidence.

 

Look to take on a mentor. You will know when someone is right for you because you will both form a good relationship from the start. Mentors are people who trust themselves and have confidence. Otherwise, it’s unlikely you would pick those people to be your mentor. You can establish a formal mentor relationship, or you can just keep in contact with someone who you respect. 

 

You will naturally take on some positive attributes just by being in this relationship. However, it doesn’t hurt to observe how your mentor interacts with others and how they solve problems. 

 

When you observe or reach out to confident people, it will help you become more confident. You can see what you are doing wrong and make changes. When you become confident, lack of trust in yourself will be a thing of the past.

Learn the Reasons Why You Don’t Trust Yourself

Many people don’t trust themselves for one reason or another. If you include yourself in this group, ask yourself why. Knowing the cause can help you break the issue down and begin to change. Once you discover the problem, you will be well on your way to learning how to trust yourself.

 

Start with your childhood. No, this doesn’t mean you have to spill your guts to a shrink lying on a couch. However, if you think back to your childhood, it can give you some clues as to why you have developed a distrust of yourself. Perhaps your parents were distrustful of themselves. It could also be siblings or other relatives. The purpose is not to blame them. Just recognize that it happened and use it to move forward.

 

Do you find it difficult to trust others? It’s a situation that causes you to be in a constant mode of distrust. It isn’t too much of a stretch for that mode to extend to you. Therefore, you have to learn how to start putting trust in other people. Most people will appreciate you for it.

 

Are you an overly sensitive person? If so, this could cause you to be mistrustful of yourself. You may take what others’ say out of context. That is because of your sensitive nature. It’s not wrong to be sensitive. You just have to realize that it can cause you to misread what others are saying or feeling.

 

Putting your trust in others is sometimes going to backfire. Some people are simply not trustworthy. They may even put on a front that they are. You should accept this as a part of life, and try not to project experiences from a few onto other people. Otherwise, you are going to continue to maintain your wall. This wall will make it difficult for you to trust others as well as yourself.

 

Another reason for not trusting yourself is that others don’t trust you. If you are not trustworthy, how can you expect to trust yourself? You may not even realize this is happening. You may think you are doing right by others when in fact, you aren’t. Ask for an honest assessment as to whether your friends and family feel you are trustworthy. That can be a hard pill to swallow, but it will offer great insight. Try not to get upset if people tell you that you aren’t trustworthy. It’s a learning experience.

5 Simple Ways To Improve Your Self-Confidence Starting Today

Experiencing self-esteem issues? It happens. Many people find themselves struggling with their overall self-confidence for a variety of reasons. Sometimes, these feelings of unworthiness appear after a difficult event, such as a negative conversation or even something more drastic, such as being fired from your dream job.

 

Other times, a lack of self-confidence could be a years-long, or perhaps even a decades-long, problem. Luckily, there are five simple ways that you can immediately help improve your self-confidence! 

 

1. Think Positively

 

Sometimes, all you need to do is think more positively. Thinking positively has a slew of wonderful benefits. By thinking more positive thoughts, you can find your stress levels lower, your mood improve, and your self-confidence grow.

 

According to an NIH study, choosing to be more positive in your thought process can even help you live a happy life. Scientifically speaking, when you think happy or positive thoughts, your brain produces serotonin, which can help you feel calmer and more focused. 

 

Be sure to keep your thoughts positive, even if you mess up. We all make mistakes. Instead of mentally berating yourself, think, “I’ll do better next time.” You’d be surprised at how this simple change in thinking can greatly improve your overall confidence!

 

2. Set Goals

 

A dwindling self-confidence can sometimes appear when one is trying to accomplish rather difficult goals. Even quite confident people can find their confidence rattled if they’ve faced a setback in their goals.

 

However, this doesn’t mean that you stop setting goals. If you find yourself in a place where nothing seems to be going your way, and your self-confidence has plummeted as a result, try to set small, easily achievable goals. 

 

For example, let’s say you’re struggling with your self-confidence during your weight loss journey. Instead of setting a goal of being in shape by a certain date, set small, daily goals that you can easily check off and feel proud of. Going for a ten-minute walk outside every day is one example.

 

3. Hang Out With Positive Friends

 

You shouldn’t think negatively. You also shouldn’t hang out with people who only speak about negative things. You shouldn’t feel drained and insecure after you spend time with your loved ones. If you do, it might be time to put a little distance between you and these negative people.

 

Instead, focus on hanging out with people who truly make you feel good and help to lift you up. Having close, stable friendships won’t just help your overall confidence. According to The American Journal of Psychiatry, these positive friends can also help you live a healthier lifestyle and even combat depression.

 

4. Stop Comparing Yourself to Everyone Else

 

It can be hard not to compare yourself to others. After all, if someone has the exact life you want, why wouldn’t you compare their life to all of your flaws? However, this line of thinking doesn’t help anyone.

 

In a study published on Science Direct, Jennifer K. Vrabel et al found that feeling envy can negatively impact your overall self-esteem. Instead of feeling jealous of other people’s lives, try to focus on what you’re grateful to have in your own life.

 

Social media can be incredibly detrimental to one’s confidence. We all know this. So, in moments when your self-esteem is particularly low, try staying off of social media for a few hours, days, or even weeks.

 

5. Take Care of Yourself

 

Finally, to help improve your self-confidence immediately, it’s important to take care of yourself. By taking care of your body, you can also take care of your emotions and your mind.

 

Help your self-esteem by:

• Getting Enough Sleep: Sleep around eight hours a night. Always ensure you get enough sleep. In a NIH study, Sakari Lemola et al found that properly sleeping every night can help people feel more confident and more optimistic in their waking lives.

• Eat Healthy: Ensure you’re eating full, healthy meals. A BMC Public Health study found that kids who eat healthier have greater confidence. So, why would it be any different for adults?

• Exercise Regularly: On days when you’re really struggling with your confidence, make sure you get moving. Regular exercise can help improve your mood and eliminate stress, as well as help you feel more confident in your body. 

5 Ways to Feel Better About Your Body

Do you like what you see in the mirror? If not, you aren’t alone, and it can sometimes seem like an impossible task to feel better about your body. Below are five ways you can feel better about your body every day.

                                                                    

1.  Give Yourself Compliments

 

When you look in the mirror each morning, tell yourself how great you look. Focus on all the positive parts of your body, and admire how unique you are. Note that you also need to accept these compliments from yourself for this to help you feel better.  

 

2.  Get Active

 

One of the best ways to immediately feel better about yourself is by exercising. This phenomenon is because exercise releases endorphins that boost your mood. When you want to change your body, exercise is the way to do it! You don't have to do anything crazy to start, as even a walk around the block can help you begin to feel better. 

 

3.  Be Grateful

 

Think of all the amazing things you have in life. This reflection doesn't just have to be about your body. Think of all the things you've accomplished in your career and your social life. You couldn’t have done these things without the body you are in! 

 

4.  Consume Positive Media

 

Sometimes it can hurt to look at what you are not. Guess what? You don't have to. Instead of filling your social media feeds with people you are jealous of, fill them with people who inspire you. Maybe they are on the same journey you are on or people who have decided they are beautiful just the way they are. The choice is yours. Follow more people who inspire you and fewer people who make you feel bad about yourself. 

 

5.  Don’t Compare Yourself To Others

 

The number one way to stop feeling bad about your body is to stop comparing yourself to others. Everyone on this earth has a different journey and has achieved different things. Just because someone has a different body doesn't mean they are happy. From now on, resolve to only compare yourself to yourself because there is no other comparison.

 

Body image is a struggle that most people face at some point in their life, but this doesn't mean you shouldn't work to feel better about your body. If you follow these five tips outlined here, you'll be feeling better about your body and more confident in no time at all. 

Better Body Image

Do you want to have a better body image, but you aren't sure where to start? Remember, having a better body image isn't a simple change. It's more of a journey. There are many things you can do along the way to help you improve the way you see yourself. 

 

Lower Social Media Consumption

 

Do you spend hours scrolling through photos of hot models on vacation on social media? This behavior needs to stop. This doesn't mean you have to give up all social media; it just means you need to mute people who make you feel envious. Jealousy and envy aren't healthy for your body image. Instead, you should try to follow people who inspire you to love yourself just the way you are. 

 

Create Reminders For Yourself

 

Get some sticky notes and put reminders and compliments on them for yourself. Then take the time to place them all over your house for you to find at a later time. You can even place them in your wallet and around your workspace at work—wherever you think you need a little encouragement.

 

Do Things That Make You Feel Good

 

Sitting and staring at the mirror and wishing you were someone else is never going to change anything. Instead, it would be best if you did active things which make you feel good. Take a class at your local gym, go for a walk in nature, or spend time with friends. All of these things will help you to feel more positive about yourself. 

 

Don’t Compare Yourself To Others

 

Whatever you do, comparing yourself to others needs to stop right now. You are your own unique person, and there is no one out there quite like you. No one has done the exact things you have done in the exact way. In that same manner, you will never look exactly like someone else. It's time to look in the mirror and know you are looking at someone who is uniquely you.

 

Learning to have a better body image is no easy task. And it certainly won't just take one step to get there. You will probably need to do all of the things on this list to have a better body image - and maybe more. But once you do, you'll be glad you chose to take the journey and learned to love yourself just the way you are. 

 

Why Are So Many People Unhappy with Their Image?

When you look in the mirror, are you happy with what you see? If the answer is no, you aren't alone because many people, men, and women alike, are unhappy with their image. But why is this?

 

The Media

 

The number one reason people are unhappy with the image they see when they look in the mirror is because of the unattainable bodies of celebrities that are shown in the media. 

 

First of all, these photos are all edited. There isn't a single photo of a celebrity that doesn't have a filter or airbrushing on it, even if it is somewhere other than Instagram. Not only that, but many celebrities have had body-altering surgeries, which means what you are looking at isn't natural, and it isn't how they were born to look.

 

Society

 

Even if you avoid all the media hype, this doesn't mean people don't feel pressure from other people to hate their image. Family members and friends can often be the first ones to point out imperfections with your body, and it is your body image that suffers because of it. They might not even say anything, but you can see how they look, and you probably still compare yourself to them, wishing you looked more like them.

 

Poor Mental Health 

 

It isn't right to blame society and the media, however, because the way you perceive your body is uniquely yours. This means that although you may have some outside influences, only you can change your mind about how you feel about your body. If you have a poor body image, this means that your mind probably isn't where it needs to be. Yes, it's good to cut out the negative media and toxic friends and family from your life, but you also need to engage on a mental journey to find out why you can't accept yourself. Nothing will change with what you perceive until you change your mind.

 

Overall, men and women all over the world are unhappy with their image. Much of this can be attributed to media and society. However, never forget that a good body image truly starts from within. This means that if you want to have a good body image, you need to work on your mentality first. Only then can you truly change the way you feel about the person in the mirror. 

 

8 Top Public Speaking Tips

So, you've got to give a speech in public? Once your stomach stops churning, here are some public speaking tips that should make your job easier. 

 

1. Outline your speech 

 

Write out what you are going to talk about. Your outline should cover all the points you want to make in your speech, in a reasonably logical order. 

 

2. Make notes 

 

One of the easiest ways is to use old-fashioned 3x5 index cards. Each one should have a bullet point on it that you can expand on. If you're using a PowerPoint slide show, then this should give you the basis for your notes. 

 

3. Practice your presentation 

 

Stand in front of a mirror and practice your speech. If you're likely to be embarrassed, do this while no one else is at home. Speaking out loud is a necessary part of this practice. Sure, it may be uncomfortable the first few times you try it, but you'll get better as you go along. Note where you stumble—this will help you decide where you need to change your speech slightly. 

 

4. Talk to one person 

 

It doesn't matter whether you're talking in a business meeting with one other person or addressing hundreds, or even thousands, of people. Talk as though you are talking face-to-face with one person. If you've got a large audience, focus on one person and talk to them. 

 

5. Stay away from humor 

 

Unless you're a renowned after dinner speaker, humor is best left out of your speech. Not everyone shares the same sense of humor so you’re likely to either fall flat (no one will laugh) or you’ll offend someone unintentionally. It’s safest to just avoid humor unless it’s spontaneous.

 

6. Don't fidget 

 

If you've got a podium then there's a natural place to put your hands. If you haven't, plan ahead of time what you’ll do with your hands so you don't fidget or gesture too much. Fidgeting makes you look nervous! 

 

7. If you stumble, carry on 

 

Most of your audience will be relieved that it's not them giving the speech. If you stumble, recover as fast as you can. Do your best not to get flustered and make sure you keep your place in your speech so you can recover from any glitches quickly. 

 

8. Keep it short 

 

Unless you've been told that you absolutely have to speak for a set amount of time, stick to the idea that less is more. Don't bore your audience. Ideally, they should be wanting more when you've finished your set speech. 

How to Craft the Ideal Elevator Speech

Networking is one of the key tools that can make the difference between a good career and a great career. Many people shy away from networking or fumble around when meeting new people because they don’t know what to say about themselves. They’re missing an opportunity to connect with the very people who need them! The secret is in crafting a short and powerful “elevator speech.”

 

The most effective elevator speeches are succinct, carefully-crafted messages that immediately tell someone why he or she needs to hire you. An elevator speech should tell the listener: 

 

1. What you do

 

Consider what you do. Then think about how you distinguish yourself from the other people in your niche and what makes you unique and memorable.

 

2. Who your target audience is

 

Visualize your ideal audience member. Think about what that person is lacking or what problems they have.

3. What need you fill

 

In this step, think about how you fill the need of that audience and what skills or talents you have that they need. 

4. What result you would like from this encounter

 

The last part of the elevator speech helps you to take this contact to the next level. What are you looking for? A meeting? A name of someone who can help you? A resource? Ask!

 

This type of elevator speech focuses on your target audience: what they lack, what they need and why you are the best person to solve their problems. This type of message is more likely to encourage your listener to talk to you, find out more about what you do, have another meeting and eventually hire you or refer you to someone who will hire you. 

 

Put these elements together using the following template: 

 

As a ____________________________________________________

                                  (Describe yourself) 

 

I help____________________________________________________ 

                                 (Your target audience) 

 

to _______________________________________________________

   (Describe the need that you fill for your target audience) 

 

so that they ________________________________________________

                                 (The benefits that they gain) 

 

Here's what I would love for us to do: ______________________________

                                                       (Your goal from this encounter) 

 

You can refine your Elevator Speech in a few ways: 

 

1. Change any long words or jargon into everyday language 

2. Cut out unnecessary words 

3. Finalize your speech by making sure it is no more than 90 words long (excluding the last part where you state your goal). 

 

Practice your speech so that you are comfortable with the message, and you feel authentic when saying it. Try it out in front of a mirror and then say it to your family and friends. 

4 Ways Introverts Can Enjoy More Social Confidence

We used the word "enjoy" in that title for a reason. Social confidence is important for building relationships. This is true of the introvert, the extrovert and the average person which is somewhere between those two personality extremes.

 

You can enjoy a much more successful career when you have powerful social skills. Your personal relationships benefit. The person who's confident when interacting with others has a high level of self-esteem. They enjoy a powerful self-belief that they are capable in social situations.

 

That's not to say that introverts don't have wonderful and rewarding lives. They simply have a view of their best life that's different from an extroverted person.

 

By the way, it's often believed that introverts despise interacting with people. That's almost never the case. It's simply that they would prefer to spend more time on their own. That's how they recharge their batteries. The extroverted person does the same thing by spending a lot of time with other people. Each of these individuals is different in many ways, and no one approach is worse or better than the other.

 

That having been said, introverts often want better skills at socializing. They understand they can improve some aspect of their life if they had more confidence when dealing with people. If this sounds like you, we're here to help. Here are 4 ways that have been proven to help introverts build confidence in social settings.

 

1. Don't Overdo It

 

Introverts can enjoy socializing just as much as introverts. In many cases they do. The difference is that the introverted person loses physical and mental energy from socializing too frequently or for too long. 

 

If you want to perform better in social situations, limit your exposure. Pick your battles. Don't try to drink from a fire hydrant. Plan short periods of time where you're going to expand your social skills over the next week or month. When you feel your energy starts to wane, return home or wherever it is you feel most comfortable recharging your batteries.

 

2. Prepare Ahead of Time

 

You might be an introvert that doesn't have much experience interacting with others. That's okay. You can learn how to socialize. Do some prep work before you know you're going to deal with others. 

 

Think of the conversation beforehand. What's the environment going to be like? Who's going to be there? This type of homework can help you succeed in social situations and become more confident and capable.

 

3. Remember … Rome Wasn't Built in a Day

 

The old saying that it took a long time to build one of the greatest civilizations in human history is important here. Big accomplishments don't happen overnight. If you are extremely introverted, work on one step at a time to become more of a social animal. 

 

Maybe the first thing you want to do is get comfortable leaving your house. You might leave your home and walk 100 feet down the road and then return home. If that's a big deal for you, give yourself a huge pat on the back!

 

You did great. Once you're comfortable leaving home, then strike up a conversation with a stranger. Take one small step at a time and before you know it you'll have walked a mile down the road to improving your social skills.

 

4. Look at Rejection like a Successful Salesperson

 

The best salespeople get excited when they hear, "No." They know that every rejection gets them closer to making their next sale. You can look at social rejection the same way. See the situation objectively. What can you learn? What did you do right? What did you do wrong? Take rejection or social failure as an opportunity to get better, and then move on.

 

Introverts aren't necessarily scared of people. They usually aren't. They just prefer to spend a minimal amount of time in the presence of others. If this is yo, and you want to build your social confidence, the tips we just shared with you can help. They make you feel more comfortable when interacting with people. You'll also be proud of yourself for stepping out of your comfort zone.