The Twice-a-Day Ritual That De-Clutters Your Mind, Helps You Sleep Better, Relieves Stress, and Boosts Mental Focus

Scott Bea is a clinical psychologist who understands how clutter can wreck your mental and physical health. He tells us that visual clutter, anything that falls within your line of sight but isn't necessary, cranks up your production of cortisol. That means more stress and anxiety.

 

Clutter negatively affects your self-esteem level, even if you don't consciously believe it's that big of a problem. Mental and physical clutter kills your ability to focus and be productive and can lead to sleep loss.

 

Physical clutter in your environment can lead to mental clutter. 

 

Your senses are constantly trying to deal with everything they detect in your messy, disorganized space. This fogs up your brain and gets it working overtime. When you remove visual, physical, and mental clutter from your life, you gain better control of not only your mental abilities. You also boost your self-esteem and feel good about what you've accomplished.

 

The Downside of a Cluttered Mind

 

Before we discuss how you can do some spring cleaning in your mind, let's get a little negative. Sometimes understanding the downside of a situation can motivate you to take action. Here are a few of the unfortunate symptoms of a cluttered mind.

 

• You constantly focus on the negative and have difficulty seeing things positively.

• You worry about things you have no control over.

• It isn't easy focusing your attention and having clarity of thought.

• You are easily and frequently distracted.

• Your brain never shuts down and is always processing information from multiple topics and lists.

• A cluttered mind can lead to multiple sleep problems.

• It's common to feel physically drained, mentally confused, and unproductive.

 

When your mind is cluttered with unnecessary "stuff," a lot of energy is required to deal with it. This can make you feel run down and fatigued. You don't feel like doing anything or dealing with anything.

 

Don't worry; there is a simple solution you can use twice a day to sleep better and relieve the stress your mental clutter is causing. You will find it easier to focus, and you'll be more productive as well. Here's what you need to do.

• Write it down when you wake up.

• Write it down when you go to bed.

What is the "it" that you should be writing down? Your thoughts. Your feelings. Anything that's going on in your head. In the morning, write out a game plan for the day. Prioritize important things and keep everything else off of your list.

 

At night, read over what you wrote that morning. Then unload your mind. Back up the mental dump truck and get it all out. If random thoughts bother you during the day and are still on your mind, let them stand up and be recognized.

 

Writing out your thoughts is such a powerful way to clear your mind. When you do this regularly in the morning and at night, you'll find you sleep better, and you're more productive during the day. This won't stop your ceaseless inner chatter. It gives you control over it while ensuring a lot of mental clutter doesn't take up full-time residency in your mind.

Beyond Handshakes: Building Rapport in a Virtual World

The rise of remote work and virtual interactions has redefined the landscape of building rapport. But don't let geographical distance or screen barriers deter you. You can cultivate strong connections even in the digital realm with a few conscious tweaks.

 

Master the Virtual Meeting Space

 

Technology can be your ally or your enemy. Familiarize yourself with video conferencing platforms, learn to utilize features like breakout rooms and polls, and ensure everyone has an equal opportunity to participate. Create a virtual space that feels inviting and accessible, fostering a sense of shared presence even through a screen.

 

Embrace Active Listening, Virtually

 

Nonverbal cues become more nuanced online. Be extra attentive to tone of voice, word choice, and pauses. Use virtual tools like emojis and reactions to show engagement and acknowledge contributions. Pay attention to chat messages and respond promptly, ensuring everyone feels heard and valued.

 

Leverage Shared Experiences

 

Creating virtual watercooler moments, scheduling social calls, hosting team games, and celebrating milestones together can help foster a sense of community beyond work-related tasks and build camaraderie. Encourage informal chats and lighthearted conversations to make online interactions less transactional.

 

Personalize Your Approach

 

While online communication might feel impersonal, go the extra mile to demonstrate individual attention. Remember birthdays, celebrate achievements and offer virtual congratulations or condolences when appropriate. Show genuine interest in colleagues' lives outside of work, fostering a sense of connection on a personal level.

 

Embrace Vulnerability and Empathy

 

Technology can create an illusion of distance but don't shy away from showing your human side. Acknowledge challenges, express gratitude, and be open about your own experiences. Virtual vulnerability can foster genuine connections and encourage others to do the same, creating a supportive and collaborative environment.

 

Building rapport in a virtual world requires intentionality and adaptation. By mastering these strategies and investing in creating a connected online workspace, you can bridge the digital divide and cultivate meaningful relationships even without face-to-face interaction.

 

Remember, whether online or offline, building rapport is an ongoing journey. The effort you invest in connecting with others will reap rewards in the form of stronger relationships, smoother collaborations, and a more rewarding professional experience.

The Art of Cultivating Connection: Building Rapport in Professional Settings

Building rapport in professional settings goes beyond polite small talk. It's about forging genuine connections that foster trust, collaboration, and success. Whether negotiating with a client, leading a team, or navigating office politics, mastering the art of rapport can unlock unexpected doors.

 

Active Listening is the Cornerstone of Connection

 

Effective communication starts with genuinely listening. Forget multitasking or waiting for your turn to speak. Give your undivided attention, maintaining eye contact and nodding to show engagement. Ask clarifying questions and paraphrase critical points to demonstrate understanding. This builds trust, reveals hidden insights, and strengthens your grasp of the situation.

 

Seek Common Ground

 

Finding shared interests or experiences fosters a sense of familiarity and comfort. Notice subtle cues – a sports jersey, a travel mug with a city you recognize – and use them to spark conversation. Share relevant personal anecdotes to bridge the gap and show yourself as relatable. Remember, it's not about forcing connections but about genuine curiosity and finding that spark of commonality.

 

Empathy is the Key to Unlocking Understanding

 

Put yourself in the other person's shoes. Consider their perspective, acknowledge their feelings, and offer support where needed. Show genuine interest in their thoughts and aspirations. A simple phrase like "I understand how you feel" or "That must be challenging" can go a long way. Demonstrating empathy creates a safe space for open communication and strengthens your bond.

 

Nonverbal Cues - The Unspoken Language of Rapport

 

Positive body language speaks volumes. Maintain an open posture, lean in during conversations, and offer genuine smiles. Mirror the other person's mannerisms subtly to establish harmony. Be mindful of your facial expressions and avoid anything that might convey boredom or frustration. Nonverbal cues can build bridges or create walls, so be conscious of your message.

 

Authenticity is the Foundation of Lasting Rapport

 

Building genuine connections requires being your true self. Avoid pretending to be someone you're not or forcing conversations about topics you don't find interesting. Embrace your unique strengths and perspectives, and allow them to shine through. People are drawn to genuine individuals, and building rapport on a foundation of authenticity creates lasting relationships.

 

Remember, building rapport is a continuous process, not a one-time event. Consistently practicing these skills will establish trust and approachability, helping you succeed professionally.

 

5 Common Public Speaking Mistakes

Even though most people don’t enjoy public speaking, there are strategies to doing it well. You don’t have to be a professional speaker to make an impact on your audience. One way to feel most comfortable speaking in front of others is to recognize and avoid these top 5 mistakes.

1. Memorizing or reading your entire presentation. 

 

Your audience came to hear you speak to them - not read or deliver a rote, memorized performance. Your responsibility is to communicate with your audience, not at them. By treating your audience as if you were having a conversation in your living room, you will find that you are much more comfortable and in better control of your nervousness. 

2. Not knowing your material.

 

If you are not familiar with your words or how your speech or presentation is meant to flow, then you are likely to make more errors. Making a mistake or two is not the issue - making a lot of them is! 

3. Speaking too fast.

 

Controlling your speed is extremely important if you expect your audience to be able to understand what you are saying. Listening to someone move at 100 mph takes much more energy than listening to them at 75! Incidentally, talking at a furious pace saps your energy as well. 

4. Staring at an object on the wall. 

 

You should not focus your attention on a spot on the wall or above the heads of your audience. Look the audience in the eye. Make that contact with your listeners, and you will then be aware of their reaction to you. Remember, public speaking is a form of communication. If you are not making eye contact, then you are not communicating. 

5. Running Out of Air.

 

Breathlessness on the podium is one of the most common mistakes made because many novice speakers do not think to breathe. If you wait until you are totally out of breath, you will then be required to inhale a huge amount of air in order to fill your lungs. In doing so, you will experience breathlessness and a tightness in your chest. My advice is to learn to breathe with the support of your diaphragm - truly the best means of controlling nervousness - and then practice supplementing your air supply before you are depleted. 

 

These 5 common mistakes can be easily rectified if you know your material, converse with your audience, learn how to control your speed, make eye contact with your listeners and remember to breathe.

8 Top Public Speaking Tips

So, you've got to give a speech in public? Once your stomach stops churning, here are some public speaking tips that should make your job easier. 

 

1. Outline your speech 

 

Write out what you are going to talk about. Your outline should cover all the points you want to make in your speech, in a reasonably logical order. 

 

2. Make notes 

 

One of the easiest ways is to use old-fashioned 3x5 index cards. Each one should have a bullet point on it that you can expand on. If you're using a PowerPoint slide show, then this should give you the basis for your notes. 

 

3. Practice your presentation 

 

Stand in front of a mirror and practice your speech. If you're likely to be embarrassed, do this while no one else is at home. Speaking out loud is a necessary part of this practice. Sure, it may be uncomfortable the first few times you try it, but you'll get better as you go along. Note where you stumble—this will help you decide where you need to change your speech slightly. 

 

4. Talk to one person 

 

It doesn't matter whether you're talking in a business meeting with one other person or addressing hundreds, or even thousands, of people. Talk as though you are talking face-to-face with one person. If you've got a large audience, focus on one person and talk to them. 

 

5. Stay away from humor 

 

Unless you're a renowned after dinner speaker, humor is best left out of your speech. Not everyone shares the same sense of humor so you’re likely to either fall flat (no one will laugh) or you’ll offend someone unintentionally. It’s safest to just avoid humor unless it’s spontaneous.

 

6. Don't fidget 

 

If you've got a podium then there's a natural place to put your hands. If you haven't, plan ahead of time what you’ll do with your hands so you don't fidget or gesture too much. Fidgeting makes you look nervous! 

 

7. If you stumble, carry on 

 

Most of your audience will be relieved that it's not them giving the speech. If you stumble, recover as fast as you can. Do your best not to get flustered and make sure you keep your place in your speech so you can recover from any glitches quickly. 

 

8. Keep it short 

 

Unless you've been told that you absolutely have to speak for a set amount of time, stick to the idea that less is more. Don't bore your audience. Ideally, they should be wanting more when you've finished your set speech. 

How to Craft the Ideal Elevator Speech

Networking is one of the key tools that can make the difference between a good career and a great career. Many people shy away from networking or fumble around when meeting new people because they don’t know what to say about themselves. They’re missing an opportunity to connect with the very people who need them! The secret is in crafting a short and powerful “elevator speech.”

 

The most effective elevator speeches are succinct, carefully-crafted messages that immediately tell someone why he or she needs to hire you. An elevator speech should tell the listener: 

 

1. What you do

 

Consider what you do. Then think about how you distinguish yourself from the other people in your niche and what makes you unique and memorable.

 

2. Who your target audience is

 

Visualize your ideal audience member. Think about what that person is lacking or what problems they have.

3. What need you fill

 

In this step, think about how you fill the need of that audience and what skills or talents you have that they need. 

4. What result you would like from this encounter

 

The last part of the elevator speech helps you to take this contact to the next level. What are you looking for? A meeting? A name of someone who can help you? A resource? Ask!

 

This type of elevator speech focuses on your target audience: what they lack, what they need and why you are the best person to solve their problems. This type of message is more likely to encourage your listener to talk to you, find out more about what you do, have another meeting and eventually hire you or refer you to someone who will hire you. 

 

Put these elements together using the following template: 

 

As a ____________________________________________________

                                  (Describe yourself) 

 

I help____________________________________________________ 

                                 (Your target audience) 

 

to _______________________________________________________

   (Describe the need that you fill for your target audience) 

 

so that they ________________________________________________

                                 (The benefits that they gain) 

 

Here's what I would love for us to do: ______________________________

                                                       (Your goal from this encounter) 

 

You can refine your Elevator Speech in a few ways: 

 

1. Change any long words or jargon into everyday language 

2. Cut out unnecessary words 

3. Finalize your speech by making sure it is no more than 90 words long (excluding the last part where you state your goal). 

 

Practice your speech so that you are comfortable with the message, and you feel authentic when saying it. Try it out in front of a mirror and then say it to your family and friends. 

4 Ways Introverts Can Enjoy More Social Confidence

We used the word "enjoy" in that title for a reason. Social confidence is important for building relationships. This is true of the introvert, the extrovert and the average person which is somewhere between those two personality extremes.

 

You can enjoy a much more successful career when you have powerful social skills. Your personal relationships benefit. The person who's confident when interacting with others has a high level of self-esteem. They enjoy a powerful self-belief that they are capable in social situations.

 

That's not to say that introverts don't have wonderful and rewarding lives. They simply have a view of their best life that's different from an extroverted person.

 

By the way, it's often believed that introverts despise interacting with people. That's almost never the case. It's simply that they would prefer to spend more time on their own. That's how they recharge their batteries. The extroverted person does the same thing by spending a lot of time with other people. Each of these individuals is different in many ways, and no one approach is worse or better than the other.

 

That having been said, introverts often want better skills at socializing. They understand they can improve some aspect of their life if they had more confidence when dealing with people. If this sounds like you, we're here to help. Here are 4 ways that have been proven to help introverts build confidence in social settings.

 

1. Don't Overdo It

 

Introverts can enjoy socializing just as much as introverts. In many cases they do. The difference is that the introverted person loses physical and mental energy from socializing too frequently or for too long. 

 

If you want to perform better in social situations, limit your exposure. Pick your battles. Don't try to drink from a fire hydrant. Plan short periods of time where you're going to expand your social skills over the next week or month. When you feel your energy starts to wane, return home or wherever it is you feel most comfortable recharging your batteries.

 

2. Prepare Ahead of Time

 

You might be an introvert that doesn't have much experience interacting with others. That's okay. You can learn how to socialize. Do some prep work before you know you're going to deal with others. 

 

Think of the conversation beforehand. What's the environment going to be like? Who's going to be there? This type of homework can help you succeed in social situations and become more confident and capable.

 

3. Remember … Rome Wasn't Built in a Day

 

The old saying that it took a long time to build one of the greatest civilizations in human history is important here. Big accomplishments don't happen overnight. If you are extremely introverted, work on one step at a time to become more of a social animal. 

 

Maybe the first thing you want to do is get comfortable leaving your house. You might leave your home and walk 100 feet down the road and then return home. If that's a big deal for you, give yourself a huge pat on the back!

 

You did great. Once you're comfortable leaving home, then strike up a conversation with a stranger. Take one small step at a time and before you know it you'll have walked a mile down the road to improving your social skills.

 

4. Look at Rejection like a Successful Salesperson

 

The best salespeople get excited when they hear, "No." They know that every rejection gets them closer to making their next sale. You can look at social rejection the same way. See the situation objectively. What can you learn? What did you do right? What did you do wrong? Take rejection or social failure as an opportunity to get better, and then move on.

 

Introverts aren't necessarily scared of people. They usually aren't. They just prefer to spend a minimal amount of time in the presence of others. If this is yo, and you want to build your social confidence, the tips we just shared with you can help. They make you feel more comfortable when interacting with people. You'll also be proud of yourself for stepping out of your comfort zone.

Become Socially Confident by Questioning Your Negative Thoughts

Confidence gives you the ability to trust in yourself. You understand that you're going to make some mistakes. You're going to fail. But you keep going. You're confident that you can create a positive outcome. You also understand that any failure is not a declaration of who you are as a person.

 

It's just a thing. It's just something that happened, nothing more. You learn from it and then move on.

 

When you lack confidence you don't usually have that powerful belief in yourself. You question your ability to do something. Before you know it, you're lacking confidence in several different activities or responsibilities. That's because when you start to lose confidence in some aspect of your life, it can be unfortunately contagious. Low self-confidence can spread to every corner of your life and have a powerfully negative impact.

 

One way people develop a lack of social confidence is by believing their nagging inner voice. 

 

You know the voice we're talking about. It's incessant, always there, and it never seems to have a positive point of view. The "what if" scenarios it paints doesn't make a pretty picture. The next time you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk, simply do this.

 

Ask yourself if the negative thought is absolutely true without a doubt.

 

Just because you have a thought doesn't make it true. Think about previous beliefs you had that you learned were incorrect. You may have been pretty sure you were thinking the right way. Then reality or a life experience taught you a valuable lesson. Your thoughts are sometimes wrong.

 

Questioning Negative Thoughts Takes Away Their Power

 

People prefer to have their experiences reaffirm their beliefs. This is why socially confident people often create positive social interactions. Their confidence leads them to a place where their ability to create a positive social outcome is greatly enhanced.

 

When you stick to negative social beliefs you do the same thing. You listen to your inner voice. It tells you that nothing but bad is going to come from some interaction with another person. You believe that thought without questioning it. 

 

This makes you nervous. You focus on a negative outcome so much that you virtually guarantee it's going to occur.

 

To keep this from happening, answer your inner voice. When it starts talking to you negatively about a social interaction, ask why it thinks that way. Challenge it to prove what it's saying without a shadow of a doubt. Then began to pick apart the negative thought.

 

Instead of asking yourself what could go wrong, ask yourself what could go right. Stop thinking the negative thought and realize there's a possibility for a wonderful and positive outcome. This is a proven way to become more socially confident and capable.