3 Steps to Finish What You Start

Do you often struggle to finish the projects you start, even when you have every intention of finishing them? 

 

Believe it or not, this is a common problem that most people face. Luckily, you can follow a few steps to ensure that you can become the type of person who finishes a project once you start it.

 

Make A Plan

 

The first step to finishing a task is making sure you have a plan at the beginning. It needs to be a plan which you write down. A mental note isn't worth the piece of paper it is written on. You may want to jump in and start something in your excitement, but you might not realize all the work and challenges you will face. When you take the time to make a plan, this will better prepare you for the task at hand, and you'll be able to spot problems much more easily.

 

Take A Break

 

If you find yourself getting overly frustrated or beginning to loathe the project because you've been working on it for so long, it's okay to take a short break. This break will help reset your mind and focus. You might even be able to solve some of the problems you are facing while you take this little breather. Just make sure that when you set an endpoint to your break, this way you can hold yourself to it and not just abandon the project.

 

Make Small Goals and Rewards For Yourself

 

As you plan how you will conquer your task or project, break your goal into smaller mini-goals. Then, cross them off and reward yourself as you complete them. It will help keep you on task, and you'll be able to feel as if you are making progress, even if it's small.  This progress will do wonders to keep your spirits high while working on the project. The little rewards you are giving yourself will probably help too.

 

So next time you get excited about a new project or goal in your life, slow down a bit and make a plan, complete with smaller goals and rewards for yourself. Then, as you pursue the project, don't be afraid to take small breaks if you need to recuperate. Chances are, thanks to these three steps, you will be much more likely to finish your new goal than leave it abandoned. 

6 Techniques to Stop Making Excuses for Not Taking Action on Your Big Goals

Are you the master of making excuses? Do you have a reason for every occasion when asked why you haven’t taken action on your Big Goals yet? If so, it’s time to take action. Those Big Goals have waited long enough. Today is the day your life changes! How? Keep reading to learn some exciting techniques designed to get your life back on track in no time.

 

Be You

 

If you think you can’t get anywhere because someone else already did it better, well think again. Regardless of who you’re comparing yourself to, no one will tackle a problem in the same way you will. Instead, relax and jump into action your way. See where being you can take you.

 

Step into the Unknown

 

Holding back because you don’t know what happens next? Sometimes you just have to find your hidden adventurer. Indulge your curiosity and jump into doing something new just to find out what happens. Besides, how unknown is it? If you’ve done your research, you probably already have a pretty good idea of just what’s going to happen.

 

Take Responsibility

 

Feeling trapped into a cycle of not being able to act because someone else is holding you back? This is just another version of the blame game. Really, the one holding you back when you make these statements is you. You’re where you are because you put yourself there. The key is to start making choices to move from this spot. 

 

Break Things Down

 

Can’t start because you’re overwhelmed? Chop up the goal into a series of much smaller action steps. Take things in small bites, celebrating each milestone as you reach it. You’ll get to the goal eventually, just hang in there.

 

Focus on the Positive

 

It’s too easy to quit because you see all the ways you’re not good enough. Instead, focus on your talents and abilities. What can you do? Better yet, what can you learn to push yourself forward? By seeing what’s possible, you’ll shift your thinking over to someone more ready to act than hold back.

 

Do Something!

 

In the end, you have to act. Making excuses about being tired or not having time isn’t going to cut it. If something is important to you, fatigue doesn’t matter. You’ll make the time (like you did when you binge-watched an entire series on Netflix). The key is to take the first step. Guaranteed, the next steps will come much easier once you’re already in motion.

 

By using these techniques, you’ll find you no longer need excuses. In fact, you’re probably feeling kind of eager to get to work about now. This is a good thing! So dust off those Big Goals, because good things are about to start happening!

What's the Difference Between Anxiety and Stress?

If someone is experiencing anxiety, it might be because they are stressed out about something. If you are stressing over something worrying you, it's safe to say you are anxious. In other words, anxiety and stress are very closely related. As a matter of fact, they create similar symptoms.

 

The Symptoms of Stress

 

• Anger
• Difficulty sleeping
• Irritability
• Fatigue
• Muscular pain
• Digestive issues

 

The Symptoms of Anxiety

 

• It's hard to focus and concentrate
• Fatigue
• Rapid breathing
• Muscular pain and tension
• Increased heart rate
• Irritability

 

Stress and anxiety are both emotional responses. They're how a person deals with what's happening around their thoughts. Usually, stress is caused by some external factor.

 

Maybe you're arguing with a friend. Something happened, and the two of you are at odds. You both care for each other, so this is very stressful. In these short-term situations, reconciliation can end the stress.

 

Some stress is long-term. If a person suffers from a chronic disease, their physical health problems can lead to mental stress that might be experienced daily. In this case, some outside source has triggered the stress response, as with most other issues where stress is experienced.

 

How Anxiety Is Different from Stress

 

We mentioned earlier that anxiety can be a response to a stressful situation. If you and your friend have a serious argument, that can cause a lot of anxiety. Anxiety differs from stress because it usually doesn't go away when the stressor is removed.

 

It's a worry taken to the extreme. This is often worrying about things that aren't actually troublesome. The person experiencing anxiety perceives some issue that really isn't there. Whereas stress is often fleeting, anxiety is commonly persistent.

 

Treating Mild Anxiety 

 

If your anxiety doesn't threaten to keep you from dealing with your daily responsibilities, it can respond to simple treatment. Being physically active is often enough to trigger a feel-good chemical response that helps you overcome mild anxiety.

 

Regularly getting plenty of restful sleep, enjoying a healthy, nutritious diet, and discussing your problems with loved ones are other coping mechanisms that defeat short-term or mild anxiety.

 

If you are regularly anxious and these treatments don't help, consult a mental health professional. When your anxiety affects your normal daily functioning, it threatens your quality of life and can lead to serious mental and physical health problems if not treated promptly.

The 4 A's of Stress Relief Can Help Reduce Feelings of Anxiety

A little anxiety from time to time is normal. You are running late to work. Your boss has already talked with you about showing up on time. You haven't been the most punctual employee in the past, and here you are, running late again. It's a common reaction to get anxious about this situation.

 

Did you let the cat out before you left home this morning? Are you going to make the right impression on a first date? This is the first time you are giving a presentation at work, and the company owner will be in attendance with several other company bigwigs. Are you properly prepared for this experience that can make or break your career?

 

These are examples of normally tense situations. Even though they aren't as unhealthy as chronic anxiety, you'd still like to avoid them. To get the upper hand on anxious feelings, whether regular or infrequent, put the four A's of stress relief to work.

 

1. Avoid
2. Alter
3. Accept
4. Adapt

 

Avoid

 

Extreme cases of anxiety may not be influenced by your surroundings or the people you deal with. The constant worry and obsession over something happens regardless of where and who you are with. In many cases, though, feelings of anxiety can be reduced or overcome entirely by avoiding the people, places, and things that are causing them.

 

This might only apply when you can control your surroundings and who you spend your time with. If you can, avoid people that make you anxious. Control your surroundings, your environment. Avoid taking on lots of unnecessary responsibilities that can ramp up your anxiety. Steer clear of things you know are likely to make you anxious.

 

Alter

 

This stress reduction practice is empowering. You take action. Look at what's happening around you and attempt to change the environment or situation to create more positive feelings.

 

You may ask others to engage in some different type of behavior. Speak about your feelings and why you hope things can be altered to address those feelings. Changing how you manage your time is a simple way to avoid a lot of unnecessary anxiety. If you can change or alter stressors making you feel anxious, do so.

 

Accept

 

Acceptance is an anxiety killer. You realize you can't avoid or alter a situation that worries you. If you can accept that most of life will be out of your control, this acceptance can replace anxiety. You act on what you can influence or control, not what you can't.

 

Adapt

 

Accepting that you, unfortunately, can't control everything provides you with another option. Why not adapt instead? If you are faced with anxiety from a situation you must constantly experience and can't control, then adapt. Develop positive mantras that make you feel good. Remember that this anxiety is a choice your emotions make and decide to feel differently.

 

Adjust the way you look at a situation. After you experience anxiety and nothing bad happens, remind yourself of this later. It can take the negative power out of anxiety. You look back and realize that you may have been obsessing and worrying for no reason.

 

These four A's of stress relief can help you experience fewer anxious feelings. You reduce your level of anxiety and create more positive emotions. If these and your other efforts to reduce anxiety don't create the outcome you're looking for, talk to a mental health professional as soon as possible.

This Prime Minister Understood You Don't Have To Be Liked to Get the Job Done

Margaret Thatcher became Britain's Prime Minister after winning the general election in 1979. She was the first woman to lead one of the major political parties in the United Kingdom. Previous economic troubles saw her take leadership in the middle of a recession.

 

Unemployment was rising dramatically. The British people weren't happy. Nevertheless, Thatcher didn't try to appease everyone by being popular. Instead, she took dramatic steps that didn't make many people happy with her.

 

Even so, she stuck by her guns. To say that she was unpopular at the beginning of her reign as Prime Minister is an understatement. The IRA tried to assassinate her in 1984. When someone tries to kill you, that's pretty much the height of unpopularity.

 

Nevertheless, she was so successful in turning around the economy that she served three consecutive terms. She enjoyed landslide reelections twice and is one of the most popular PMs in recent memory.

 

Nevertheless, she had this lesson to teach us about needing people to like us.

 

"If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing."

 

The best leaders are often well-liked. People respect their power and their achievements. When great leaders produce the results their followers are looking for, it's natural for them to enjoy popularity.

 

That's not to say that leaders should develop a dependence on being popular.

 

Margaret Thatcher understood this. She saw the inherent problem that can develop when approval becomes more important than delivering results.

 

You Don't Have To Be a Leader to Learn from This Lesson

 

You're probably not a politician. Very few people are. Maybe you don't long to become Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. It doesn't matter if you never throw your hat into the political arena. The lesson here is still relevant for so many of us.

 

If you want to accomplish anything, you can't worry if your actions will be popular or not. If you want to be popular, put everyone else first and worry about yourself last.

 

While helping others is an admirable character trait, you have to be careful. If you're doing it for people to like you, that's the wrong reason. Human beings can be rather fickle, which means your popularity can disappear quickly. 

 

No matter what you're trying to accomplish in your life, do it for the right reasons. It's easier to create the results you're looking for when you keep your eyes focused on the game plan rather than worrying about being popular.

Become Socially Confident by Questioning Your Negative Thoughts

Confidence gives you the ability to trust in yourself. You understand that you're going to make some mistakes. You're going to fail. But you keep going. You're confident that you can create a positive outcome. You also understand that any failure is not a declaration of who you are as a person.

 

It's just a thing. It's just something that happened, nothing more. You learn from it and then move on.

 

When you lack confidence you don't usually have that powerful belief in yourself. You question your ability to do something. Before you know it, you're lacking confidence in several different activities or responsibilities. That's because when you start to lose confidence in some aspect of your life, it can be unfortunately contagious. Low self-confidence can spread to every corner of your life and have a powerfully negative impact.

 

One way people develop a lack of social confidence is by believing their nagging inner voice. 

 

You know the voice we're talking about. It's incessant, always there, and it never seems to have a positive point of view. The "what if" scenarios it paints doesn't make a pretty picture. The next time you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk, simply do this.

 

Ask yourself if the negative thought is absolutely true without a doubt.

 

Just because you have a thought doesn't make it true. Think about previous beliefs you had that you learned were incorrect. You may have been pretty sure you were thinking the right way. Then reality or a life experience taught you a valuable lesson. Your thoughts are sometimes wrong.

 

Questioning Negative Thoughts Takes Away Their Power

 

People prefer to have their experiences reaffirm their beliefs. This is why socially confident people often create positive social interactions. Their confidence leads them to a place where their ability to create a positive social outcome is greatly enhanced.

 

When you stick to negative social beliefs you do the same thing. You listen to your inner voice. It tells you that nothing but bad is going to come from some interaction with another person. You believe that thought without questioning it. 

 

This makes you nervous. You focus on a negative outcome so much that you virtually guarantee it's going to occur.

 

To keep this from happening, answer your inner voice. When it starts talking to you negatively about a social interaction, ask why it thinks that way. Challenge it to prove what it's saying without a shadow of a doubt. Then began to pick apart the negative thought.

 

Instead of asking yourself what could go wrong, ask yourself what could go right. Stop thinking the negative thought and realize there's a possibility for a wonderful and positive outcome. This is a proven way to become more socially confident and capable.

Socially Confident People Know It's Not Always about Them

Sometimes a lack of confidence comes from internalizing your thoughts. You're thinking about what you are doing wrong, what you could do better, and why you aren't good enough to make friends or socialize in some other way. Those thought patterns can wreck your social confidence so much that you withdraw and simply avoid interacting with other people.

 

The socially confident person knows that the focus should be on others. That's what socializing is all about, isn't it? It's about interacting with others, not yourself. This is why social confidence leads to a person reaching out rather than inward.

 

You can start believing in your ability to interact with others by thinking about them and not so much about yourself. Ask them how they feel. Compliment them on their clothing. Get them talking about their thoughts and emotions rather than you focusing on your own.

 

This is just one way socially confident men and women approach human interaction. They also understand that if their effort at socializing doesn't work, it's not always about them.

 

You Can't Control Other People

 

Imagine the following scenario. You don't always feel comfortable in social settings. You're at a work event you had to attend. There are a bunch of people you don't know there. In fact, you only know a couple of people out of several dozen.

 

You decide to stake take a step out of your comfort zone. 

 

You approach someone, put a smile on your face, and introduce yourself. They begrudgingly return your greeting, and don't look too happy that you approached them. You stick to your guns. You make a comment about some workplace incident that happened recently. The person responds with a disinterested look and simply walks away.

 

How do you perceive that interaction?

 

The socially confident person doesn't care. She feels good about herself. She took a step out of her comfort zone and greeted a total stranger. That was big for her. She is learning to be socially confident.

 

It's not her fault that the other person is having a bad day or for whatever reason didn't want to communicate with her. She shrugs off the event and moves on to someone else.

 

Understand that you can do everything right and someone might not respond to you favorably. That's just life. Don't beat yourself up. You can never understand what's going on in another person's mind or in their life. You do what you need to do to build your social skills. That's all you can do. It's all you have control over, your own actions.

 

Be happy that you tried something when you weren't really comfortable. Congratulate yourself for the effort, knowing that everyone won't respond in a negative way to your attempts at socializing.

How to Stop Yourself from Sabotaging Your Own Success

When you sabotage your own success, you are using action or inaction that will undermine your progress and prevent you from accomplishing your goals. You will be hindering your own success. 

 

Some people may undermine their good intentions and defeat their long-term goals. If you take destructive steps like this, it can have a negative impact on almost every part of your life, including your career and relationships. 

 

This article will discuss self-sabotage and teach you ways to stop yourself from sabotaging your own success in life. 

Why Do People Develop Self-Sabotaging Behaviors?

 

There are various reasons why people may thwart their own progress. The causes can range from effects of prior relationships to issues experienced in childhood. Other reasons include coping problems and low self-esteem.

 

Self-sabotage may serve as a temporary coping mechanism for dealing with past traumas and stressful situations. However, it usually makes those problems even harder to deal with, and limits someone’s ability to move beyond them. 

How Can You Stop Yourself from Sabotaging Your Own Success?

 

You can overcome your self-sabotaging problems and replace them with self-confidence, with practice. Here are some tips to stop yourself from sabotaging your own success:

1. Recognize the Behaviors You Use to Sabotage Yourself

 

If you want to stop self-sabotaging, you must recognize the behaviors that sabotage you. Think about goals you may have had for years but have not yet accomplished. Are there areas where you put off making decisions? Do you suffer from a lack of motivation, in minor things as well as important things?

2. Understand Emotions that Lead to Self-Sabotaging Behaviors

 

Behaviors that cause you to sabotage your own success often stem from feelings of anger, anxiety, or worthlessness. Try to manage those emotions, so you won’t commit yourself to any behaviors that will have negative consequences. Check for warning signs of anxiety or anger before they can get out of control.

3. Change Unhelpful Thoughts, Emotion, and Behaviors

 

As you discover negative thoughts and emotions that trigger your self-sabotage behavior, challenge them. If you change one of those aspects, you can change the others more easily.

4. Develop Behaviors that Support You and Your Goals

 

After you identify and begin defeating the false thoughts and emotions that lead to self-sabotaging behavior, you can then begin rebuilding your confidence and self-esteem. 

5. Challenge All of Your Excuses

 

Pay attention to all the excuses you’ve developed when you don’t reach a goal, or when you fail in some way. Usually, the excuses are made to cope with your pain of failing. 

6. Don’t Feed Your Fears Anymore

 

Fears will not go away all by themselves, simply by your pretending they’re not there, or by pushing them to the side. If you don’t attend to fears, they grow stronger. Challenge your fears and see if they’re real and take actions to reduce fears wherever you can. 

7. Learn From Each of Your Mistakes

 

You’re probably the only one who sees yourself as a failure, but many people see themselves in the same way. Everyone will make mistakes – at home and in their professional life. Learn from those mistakes, rather than dwelling on them or burying them. 

8. Understand Your Limits

 

Don’t take on many things at once that you don’t have the capacity, control, or capabilities to handle. You can go after more than one objective, but don’t take on more than you can accomplish. Know what your limits are and stay within them. 

Final Thoughts

 

When you sabotage your own success, it makes life more challenging than it needs to be. There is a great deal of pressure in your life, which can translate into anxiety or stress in your career position and your relationships. 

 

Embrace your capabilities and your potential to be successful, and don’t let doubts or negative emotions keep you from becoming everything you desire to be. 

How to Deal with Constantly Feeling Overwhelmed

Do you get tense just thinking about all of the responsibilities you have? If so, you probably deal with feelings of fear, frustration, anxiety, and maybe even anger. Once in a while, you may deal with these feelings, but when it is each day for weeks or months on end, it is time to learn how to deal with them. 

6 Suggestions to Deal with the Constant Feeling of Overwhelm

Don’t let yourself get caught up in the struggles that come with an overstuffed plate. Instead, take these steps to help you deal with those constant feelings of overwhelm: 

• Try to Find the Primary Cause: Think about what is going on in your life or career. Ask yourself what is causing you to feel stressed and overwhelmed? Do you have an enormous project weighing you down? Is there something that can be delegated? If you can hand off the task, do so. If it is a large project, break it down into manageable steps. 

• Breathe Deeply: Feelings of overwhelm will leave you tense, and you may be breathing in shallow bursts. Slowing down to breathe from your diaphragm will help you lower your stress response. It will help you reassess what needs to be done.

• Establish Boundaries: You need to expect that you will disappoint people, but you will want to learn to tell people ‘no’ for your well-being. Do what you need to ensure your feelings of overwhelm do not overtake you. You may determine that you will not answer any email between the 9 and 10 AM hours so that you can focus on project work.

• Ask for Help: Sometimes, fighting overwhelm needs more than better calendar management. The listening ear of a friend or understanding HR personnel may be what you need to get through the day. They can help put things back into perspective.

• Keep a Journal: Journaling has many benefits. One of which is to help you clear your mind so you can process thoughts. Expressing yourself freely on paper will bring you much relief.

• Put Perfectionism in Its Place: We use perfectionism as an excuse to make some projects appear bigger than they are. It also encourages procrastination which means things pile up, and then you are overwhelmed at the mess. Instead, use your boundaries to determine if you really need to take on a particular project or if someone else can do it.

Fight back against overwhelm when you step back, assess the situation, take a deep breath, and ask for help.