Don't Let Your Circumstances Dictate Your Self-Worth

Star Trek was a groundbreaking science fiction TV series of the 1960s. A matter transporter was one of the technological wonders the show employed in many episodes. An object or a person could be teleported from the Star Ship Enterprise to a transporter on board another spacecraft or a nearby planet.

 

Imagine that the fictitious transporter worked. You could teleport yourself from your current location to anywhere else on earth. You could leave any environment or situation in just a few seconds and transport yourself to a much more favorable location.

 

If you are familiar with the original Star Trek television series or the many TV and movie shows and films it spawned, you know how timely the transporter could be. Captain Kirk, Spock, Dr. McCoy, and others were often saved from imminent death when transported to a much safer and friendlier location.

 

Transporting Your Self-Worth

 

You have a virtual transporter in your mind. You can transport yourself to another reality whenever your experiences change. When things are going great, many people live in a high self-worth reality. When life gets tough, they shift their self-worth to a lower-quality reality. 

 

We often allow our perception of ourselves to change due to our experiences. We allow people, places, and things to change our feelings. If we already struggle with self-worth, it happens more often than not. It’s part of being human, a flawed human that we all are. That doesn’t make it right. It just means you need to be aware of the possibility of it happening.

 

Keep this in mind, your environment and your thoughts might change but it doesn’t change the unique individual you are. You are a good person soul deep. You are capable and worthy. So, wherever you go, no matter what external factors are involved, there you are.

 

There’s No Need to Shift Your Self-Worth

 

Feeling the need to flee doesn't happen to someone with a high level of self-worth. They recognize the person that they are inside no matter what external factors are happening around them. 

 

People with a great self-image and high self-esteem are comfortable in their skin. They don't change their opinion of who they are just because of the surrounding circumstances. This is good because our circumstances and experiences frequently change without us being able to stop them.

 

Value yourself. Embrace who you are, warts and all. Intimately get to know your strengths and weaknesses, your skills and abilities. Respect the fact that you are a unique individual that has never existed before you came along and will never exist after you are gone. That's reason enough to respect and love yourself greatly. 

 

Admire who you are. You were created uniquely and are valuable to the world just as you are. Don't let your present circumstances change the way you perceive yourself because they can change without any control on your part.

Give Yourself Permission For Self-Care

The practice of self-care means taking care of your physical and mental health and being aware that you must take care of yourself as the highest priority. Self-care increases stamina, reduces stress, and decreases the risk of illness, so we must treat ourselves as number one to thrive and be strong.

 

Still, we may think putting ourselves first is selfish or egotistical. Others are challenged with low self-esteem, making them feel like they don’t deserve to be first. Some people think they must do everything for everybody and will put aside their goals to assist others. These scenarios impact our self-esteem, keep us from pursuing our goals, and foster self-care neglect.

 

We must understand that if we don’t care for ourselves, we won’t be able to help anyone else, we may feel stressed, and our health suffers. When our mental or physical health is poor, we lose motivation and energy, and our quality-of-life decreases.

 

How can we treat ourselves compassionately and make self-care a part of our daily routine? 

 

About Self-Care

 

The World Health Organization explains that self-care is “the ability of individuals, families, and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a health worker.”

 

The National Library of Medicine published a study on the role of self-care related to stress and mental well-being during the COVID-19 pandemic. A tool, the Self-Care Activities Screening Scale (SASS-14), was used to evaluate the study participants. Four main areas were considered:

 

• Health consciousness

• Nutrition and physical activity

• Sleep quality

• Interpersonal and intrapersonal coping strategies

 

The result of the study is that self-care significantly improves our well-being. However, the higher a person’s perceived stress level, the more challenging it is to practice self-care.

 

Self-Care Basics

 

Reduction of perceived stress is essential for self-care. The following are basic strategies to help you cope with stress and lead you to a healthy lifestyle.

 

Embrace Healthy Foods: Nutritious meals can improve your energy and brain power. Healthy foods include fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean meats, fish and seafood, nuts and seeds, beans, low-fat dairy products, and unsaturated oils, such as olive oil. Avoid fried foods, salt, sugar, fast foods, cakes and pies, and too much caffeine. 

 

Sleep Well: The Sleep Health Foundation recommends that adults aged 18-64 sleep 7 - 9 hours and adults over 64 sleep 7 – 8 hours nightly. Avoid actions that might keep you awake at night, such as caffeine in the afternoon, using electronics before bedtime, and taking long naps during the day. You can foster a good night’s sleep by exercising during the day, going to sleep and waking up at the same time daily, and ensuring that your bedroom is quiet. 

 

Every Workout Counts: Exercise helps to relieve stress and make you stronger mentally and physically. Choose an activity that you enjoy, such as a brisk walk, and strive to exercise at least 30 minutes daily.

 

Stay Connected: Among many benefits, having good friends can relieve stress and promote happiness. The Mayo Clinic reports that friends help you cope with traumas, improve self-confidence, and reduce your risk of health problems.

 

Time Management and Boundaries: The night before, create a to-do list for the next day and prioritize each item. This “roadmap” for the day will help you focus on the tasks that must be completed. Work through your goals and tasks in priority order. Also, consider setting boundaries to prevent interruptions to your plan. For example, if you block out 3 hours to focus on a task, let those who need to know that you aren’t available during that time. 

 

Conclusion

Taking care of yourself is essential to reduce stress and reap the benefits of good health and happiness. In our busy lives, we may feel we don’t have time for self-care, thus impacting our health and energy and limiting our capacity to help others. Remember that you are not being selfish by treating yourself as number one and setting boundaries is not rude. These are necessary concepts to help you cope with stress and boost your well-being.

 

References

 

https://www.who.int/health-topics/self-care#tab=tab_1

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8678542/

 

https://www.sleephealthfoundation.org.au/sleep-topics/how-much-sleep-do-you-really-need

 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/friendships/art-20044860

 

3 Reasons and 3 Ways to be Present

The greatest minds on the subject will tell you we don't fully understand what existence is. For regular people, there's the idea of a past, a present, and a future. We understand we're living right now, and that's pretty much what we can wrap our minds around. We see our life playing out before us. We have senses we use to experience the world.

 

We're in the present now and have memories of a past existence. We have hopes and plans for our future. For most of us, that's what we know about life.

 

Deep thinkers tell us that all we have is the present moment. When you think about it, that makes sense. Your past is gone. There's no control over it. You really don't have any control over your future either. All you have is right now. As it turns out, embracing your present reality has a lot of benefits. Here are three reasons why you should spend more time in the present moment and three simple ways you can do just that.

 

3 Benefits of Embracing the Moment

 

1. Better Relationships and Improved Social Skills

 

Focusing on right now opens your eyes. You see the people in your life with more clarity. This includes those that you barely interact with, as well as the people you see frequently. That leads to better social skills and healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

 

2. Less Stress and Anxiety

 

This is the go-to benefit lifelong mindfulness practitioners talk about. There is much less stress when you worry less about tomorrow, next week, and next month and appreciate the present. 

 

3. Greater Self-Love and Self-Esteem

 

Being mindful of your present state of being leads to self-awareness. You find you have so much more to appreciate about who you are right now and fewer expectations of your future self.

 

3 Simple Ways To Live in the Present Moment

 

1. Breathe Deeply

 

Take a few deep breaths and focus on them. Breathe in and out and appreciate your present moment. Do this for a couple of minutes whenever you need to calm your racing mind. This is a stress-relieving aspect of mindfulness, meditation, yoga, and other practices for living in the now.

 

2. Practice Daily Gratitude

 

Look around you. What do you have to be grateful for? Your truest blessings are here right now. Practice gratitude each day for the good things in your life. This teaches you to appreciate the present moment instead of spending all your time wishing for something better in the future.

 

3. Forgive Yourself and Others

 

Forgiving is about letting go of the past. You remove future expectations as well. This is key to experiencing all you can in the present moment.

 

Those are just a few reasons why being present is so important. You also have three proven ways to focus more on right now and less on the past and future. Give yourself the gift of being present today so that your tomorrow can be more fulfilling.

 

Don't Let Your Circumstances Dictate Your Self-Worth

Star Trek was a groundbreaking science fiction TV series of the 1960s. A matter transporter was one of the technological wonders the show employed in many episodes. An object or a person could be teleported from the Star Ship Enterprise to a transporter on board another spacecraft or a nearby planet.

 

Imagine that the fictitious transporter worked. You could teleport yourself from your current location to anywhere else on earth. You could leave any environment or situation in just a few seconds and transport yourself to a much more favorable location.

 

If you are familiar with the original Star Trek television series or the many TV and movie shows and films it spawned, you know how timely the transporter could be. Captain Kirk, Spock, Dr. McCoy, and others were often saved from imminent death when transported to a much safer and friendlier location.

 

Transporting Your Self-Worth

 

You have a virtual transporter in your mind. You can transport yourself to another reality whenever your experiences change. When things are going great, many people live in a high self-worth reality. When life gets tough, they shift their self-worth to a lower-quality reality. 

 

We often allow our perception of ourselves to change due to our experiences. We allow people, places, and things to change our feelings. If we already struggle with self-worth, it happens more often than not. It’s part of being human, a flawed human that we all are. That doesn’t make it right. It just means you need to be aware of the possibility of it happening.

 

Keep this in mind, your environment and your thoughts might change but it doesn’t change the unique individual you are. You are a good person soul deep. You are capable and worthy. So, wherever you go, no matter what external factors are involved, there you are.

 

There’s No Need to Shift Your Self-Worth

 

Feeling the need to flee doesn't happen to someone with a high level of self-worth. They recognize the person that they are inside no matter what external factors are happening around them. 

 

People with a great self-image and high self-esteem are comfortable in their skin. They don't change their opinion of who they are just because of the surrounding circumstances. This is good because our circumstances and experiences frequently change without us being able to stop them.

 

Value yourself. Embrace who you are, warts and all. Intimately get to know your strengths and weaknesses, your skills and abilities. Respect the fact that you are a unique individual that has never existed before you came along and will never exist after you are gone. That's reason enough to respect and love yourself greatly. 

 

Admire who you are. You were created uniquely and are valuable to the world just as you are. Don't let your present circumstances change the way you perceive yourself because they can change without any control on your part.

 

6 Benefits to Having an Unwavering Belief In Yourself

Every day we make dozens of decisions. Our whole day is nothing more than a series of actions, one after another. We're used to it because this is part of what it means to be an adult, right?

 

The thing is, sometimes, we become worn down by the challenges of life. We miss the mark and start to doubt ourselves. Life becomes more difficult. 

 

What does this have to do with the decisions we make or the actions we take? Simple. When you start faltering, you lose your belief in yourself. Everything becomes a little harder. 

 

Now consider what it would be like to simplify things again. By believing in yourself, amazing things happen.

 

You Show Yourself Respect

 

When you doubt yourself, you run yourself down. You're saying you're not good enough or smart enough to know what you're doing when in truth, you are. You wouldn't allow someone to do this to your best friend. Why would you do it to yourself? Instead, by choosing confidence, you're also choosing to acknowledge just how awesome you are.

 

You Learn About Yourself

 

We all have a lot of knowledge we're not even aware we possess. This knowledge is an accumulation of wisdom we've collected in our lives that we tap into when making decisions. When you trust your instincts, you discover just how much you truly do know.

 

You Push Yourself

 

Sure, some decisions are easy. History tells us exactly what to expect when we make them. But when you take a leap of faith into unwavering self-confidence, you're also challenging yourself to see how much you truly know and just how right you can be. It is a pretty powerful feeling.

 

You Gain More

 

Nothing is ever gained by standing still. When you hesitate because of self-doubt, you're going to miss all kinds of possibilities. Lack of confidence keeps us from trying new things. After all, if there's no chance of success, why even try? But confidence knows you've got what it takes to seize an opportunity when you see it.

 

You Learn Tenacity

 

When you don't trust yourself, you tend to avoid the hard decisions entirely, stalling out any progress in your life. By choosing to believe in yourself, you keep going, learning how to hang in there during the rough stuff. This is also where you achieve real growth as an individual.

 

You Feel Motivated

 

When you're down on yourself, it's easy to think there's no point in even trying. Self-doubt will drop you right into depression if you're not careful. But unwavering self-belief creates optimism. The whole world looks brighter, and you can't wait to be part of it because you know you have what it takes to succeed there.

 

4 Ways You Can Deal with Self-Doubt

Everyone experiences self-doubt from time to time. It's part of life. The important thing is that when you do experience self-doubt, you handle it in the right way. This will ensure that you can overcome it and get back on the road to success in no time at all. Keep reading to find a few ways to deal with self-doubt when negative thoughts arise. 

 

1. Resolve Not to Compare Yourself With Others

 

Often, thoughts of self-doubt come when you compare yourself to someone else. Resolve in advance not to let this happen. 

 

When it does (which it probably will at some point), remind yourself that you aren't the other person. They have a journey completely different from your own. Look at how far you've come on your journey. Your journey is yours and yours alone. 

 

2. Remember the Past is the Past

 

Many people experience self-doubt when thinking about the past. Whenever the past comes up in your mind, remind yourself that it is over and done with. If you dwell on the past, it will make self-doubt worse.

 

Look towards the future and all of the plans you have instead. It can also help to list all the things you are grateful for in the present. 

 

3. Remind Yourself that Failures are Lessons

 

Everyone will have failures at some point in their life. This is inevitable. When you experience a failure, you will likely have some thoughts of self-doubt. 

 

Don't let these get you down. Instead of focusing on the negative, resolve to focus on the positive. Run through the lessons you have learned to feel confident you won't make the same mistake again.

 

4. Have a Support System

 

There is nothing worse than experiencing self-doubts and feeling alone simultaneously. You should do everything in your power to have a support system in place when these doubts start to creep in. 

 

The support system doesn't have to be physical. It could also be a forum or an online support group. Either way, it should be someone you trust to talk to when the going gets rough. They can help remind you of what an amazing person you are and the journey you’ve embarked on to get where you are.  

 

Overall, battling self-doubt when it pops up is never easy. If you follow the four suggestions on this list, you will find yourself well equipped to deal with self-doubt when it does arise. Before you know it, you'll be back on your way to achieving your dreams as your confident and amazing self! 

 

Why Do We Struggle With Self-Care?

We all know that self-care is important to your well-being and success in life. This fact alone doesn't make it any easier to carve out more time in your life for it. Please keep reading to discover some of the reasons you may struggle with self-care so that you can be more aware as you try to work it into your routine. 

 

You Feel Shame

 

Many people don’t find the time for self-care for the simple reason that deep down; they don't believe that they deserve it. This comes from a poor self-image when an individual doesn't believe they are worth the time for proper self-care. Improving your self-image and reminding yourself that you are deserving of self-care can make it easier to schedule time in your busy life for it. 

 

You Don’t Want to Make the Effort

 

It is also an effort to set aside time out of your schedule to take care of yourself, and some people are too lazy to make this effort. Often this laziness goes back to a poor self-image or poor time management, or both, so these two aspects may need to be addressed if you find yourself not wanting to make an effort to include self-care in your life. Sometimes these people find it is easier to engage in self-care when they put it directly into their schedule. 

 

You Don’t Know What Self-Care is

 

In this day and age, it is common to hear people say "treat yourself," and it's important to distinguish that treating yourself is not self-care. Treating yourself should come as a reward after a specific activity, not a regular staple in your life. For example, "treating yourself" is an ice cream cone on a Friday night, while "self-care" is being sure you eat enough healthy fruits and vegetables. 

 

You Are Tired

 

The number one reason that people struggle with self-care is that they are tired. This is a self-perpetuating problem because, without proper self-care, you will feel increasingly tired. If this is something you struggle with, it's important to get over that first hump of self-care and get yourself some rest so that you don't feel too tired for future self-care sessions. 

 

All in all, there are several reasons you could be struggling with self-care. This article might not even list your specific reason here. Regardless, it would be best if you found out why you are struggling with self-care so that you can solve the problem. Without self-care, you will be tired and stressed for the rest of your life. 

 

The Balancing Act: Letting Go Of The Need To Control Everything And Finding Harmony

As chaotic as modern life can be, you can find balance. It's difficult to get it right, especially when you're trying to embrace life's spontaneity while also creating an efficient routine to maximize your time and opportunities. 

 

There's a big part of it that requires control, the problem is that the desire for too much control can stress you out and make you incredibly anxious. This need for too much control steeps you into a state of perpetual tension. Here, we talk about the balancing act and the art of letting go. 

 

Control is an Illusion 

 

Control is an illusion, it's the idea that you can dictate all of the outcomes throughout your life. There are, of course, certain things you can control. If you're getting a degree, license, or qualification in something, you can control the level of study you put in for the testing process. That's in your hands. 

 

Not everything is that simple, though, and the reality is most things in life are inherently unpredictable. So, the more you cling to this illusion of control, the more stressed out you become and the more frustrated and disappointed you feel when things don't go your way. Accept that there are limits to what you can control. 

 

Embrace the Uncertainty 

 

Some of the beauty of life lies in its unpredictability, some of the greatest moments of your life probably came from nowhere. Embrace that uncertainty, it might be a shift in your perspective, but it gives you the freedom to navigate new situations with more grace and patience. Don't resist change, don't avoid unpredictability, lean in, and recognize there's a chance for growth. 

 

Cultivate Mindfulness

 

Mindfulness is a useful tool and a powerful one in your journey to let go and find balance. By cultivating a level of mindfulness, you are detaching yourself from the desperate need to control everything. Focus on the present, find peace, and enjoy clarity in the here and now instead of getting caught up in the past or obsessing about the future. 

 

Identify Your Areas of Control 

 

As important as it is to understand how limited your control is, it's just as important to recognize your areas of control. When you understand what you can control, you can focus your efforts and energy on those areas to maximize that control. It also gives you a deep sense of empowerment, without the added burden of managing something that's unmanageable. 

 

The Process

 

While some people think letting go is showing weakness, the reality is it's recognition that you are human. Sometimes, you have to surrender to the process and let life do what it's going to do without trying to control every single detail. You can't micromanage, so don't bother trying!

 

The Joy of Imperfection 

 

There are two big issues that plague us – the need for control and perfectionism and they go hand-in-hand. When you embrace imperfection, you're letting go of control – you're letting go of the idea that everything needs to be flawless and freeing yourself from the unrealistic expectations society places on you. Find joy in those imperfections, that's where you can flourish. 

 

Embrace Self-Compassion 

 

Self-compassion is the final piece of the puzzle because you can't let go and find balance without it. You need to recognize that it's okay that you don't have it all figured out, that it's okay if you're still making mistakes – it's all part of the human experience. `Treat yourself with kindness in those moments of uncertainty. 

 

Final Thoughts

 

There is a delicate balancing act between leaning into life and letting go of control. You have to make a conscious effort to loosen your grip on those reins, but in doing so, you will finally be able to find harmony in life! The biggest secret out there is you'll find harmony in this moment, which means letting go and enjoying every moment for what it is.