4 Techniques for Handling Negative Emotion

We don’t always do the right thing. We eat too much. We stay out too late. We make mistakes, break promises, and live a life that isn’t always in keeping with our goals.

 

All of this leads to negative emotions: guilt, shame, even anger come creeping in to derail your attempts to get back on track. How can you handle these kinds of negative emotions without letting it ruin your day?

 

We start by looking at three ways you have used to handle it and then move on to one technique you should be using all the time.

 

Avoiding the Emotion

 

Don’t we love pretending we can make the emotions go away? We bury them, suppress them, explain them away, sometimes even turning to things like drugs or alcohol just to make them stop. The problem? Anytime you’re avoiding something because of negative emotions, you’re letting the emotion control you. The better solution? Give yourself room to understand it, and deal with the underlying cause. 

 

Pretending the Emotion is Not There

 

This coping mechanism is a little different. You fall into it by denying you ever felt the negative emotion in the first place. Here the problem is, the more you deny an emotion, the more it grows until it can’t be ignored any longer. Your solution, this time, is simple. Acknowledge the emotion. Accept it for what it is and let it fade on its own.

 

Becoming the Emotion

 

Sometimes the negative emotion is so powerful it becomes part of who you are. At some point, you might even start taking a certain amount of pride in it. You start saying, “Well, I’m just a mad person” or even bragging about how worse off you are than anyone else. Now you’ve become the emotion. The solution? Let the feelings process. Journal, talk to a friend, whatever you need to do, do, to let the emotion move on. Pro tip? Start encouraging positive emotions, allowing them to come in and replace the negative.

 

Learn

 

Learning the lessons of your emotions is perhaps the strongest technique of all. When you realize negative emotions are useful in your life and are there to teach you about yourself, doors start opening. You begin to see different possibilities. Feelings as educational tools have no power to control you at all, but conversely, have the power to change you in very positive ways. Like when you’re feeling angry about injustice, and you use this anger to create positive change in the world.

 

How to Deal With a Difficult Emotion Using Mindfulness

Mindfulness has a great many uses and is often prescribed by self-help gurus, doctors, writers and others as a tool anyone can use to improve their mental health.

 

Often these focusses on the long-term benefits of being more present and aware. At the same time though, mindfulness can also be used like a scalpel to deal with more acute problems. Here we will look at how it can be leveraged for instance to tackle specific emotions as they arise.

 

Turning Towards Emotions

 

Normally when we experience negative emotions, we react either by trying to ‘fight them’ or by trying to suppress them. This can be described as almost ‘turning away’ from our emotions to try and deny them their power over us.

 

Unfortunately, this ultimately tends to result in our becoming more stressed or upset as the emotions bubble under the surface, or as we frustrate ourselves in trying to fight them.

 

Instead, mindfulness teaches us to turn towards our emotions. What this means, is that you are going to listen to the thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing and then simply acknowledge them. Now you say ‘I am stressed’, ‘I am embarrassed’ or ‘I am upset’. Don’t be ashamed or upset that emotion exists but simply recognize that you are currently in that state.

 

People get upset sometimes. People get angry sometimes. But if you’re simply aware of your condition, then you can be aware that perhaps the thoughts you’re thinking aren’t completely objective. What’s more, you should keep hold of the knowledge that emotions aren’t permanent. In other words, you’re feeling angry right now and as such your thoughts shouldn’t be taken too seriously. But in a few hours, you will likely feel better and then the world will seem like a brighter place again.

 

This creates a subtle but powerful shift. No longer is the world a terrible place and thus you are upset, now you are upset and thus the world seems like a terrible place. The difference is that you now know that belief is not true.

 

Debriefing

 

What’s more, being aware and accepting of your emotions in this way will allow you to assess them in a kind of ‘debriefing’ and to look at what triggered them, how you dealt with them and what they made you think and do. The more you break down and intellectualize your emotions, the more you will find you gain control over them.

 

The Four Building Blocks of Every Emotion (and Why This is Important)

What are emotions, really? 

 

We know enough about emotions to be able to define them fairly well. We can talk about being 'happy' or 'sad' because we've understood these concepts since we were small. But truly understanding an emotion can seem complicated, especially when you're pushed to explain it.

 

Every emotion is made up of four parts. Let’s explore first what those parts are.

 

The Stimulus

 

For an emotion to happen, you need something which will inspire it. This can be anything at all. Generally, emotions come from outside sources, though they can also arise from your thoughts. You never know what might raise an emotion – a smell, a taste, a memory, a person, a place, or even an activity you're taking part in will inspire emotions. Even babies will be inspired to emotion through simple things like being hungry, uncomfortable, amused, or even by the smell or sound of their caregiver.

 

Your Awareness

 

A situation alone won't be enough to inspire emotion. At some point, your mind will become aware of the situation. This can be a conscious or even unconscious thing. We start paying attention, and this stimulus suddenly matters to us in a way the other things around us don't.

 

The Judgement

 

Are you okay with this stimulus? Your unconscious self already knows your likes and dislikes and is already steering you toward either a positive or negative emotional response. 

 

The Reaction

 

Your physical self is already figuring out the situation and is responding. For example, you might not have noticed the spider that just scuttled across your hand, but your eyes have widened significantly, and you might have felt a chill. This is followed very closely by the physical reaction (in this case, pulling your hand away) and possibly even a verbal expression (a scream, perhaps, if you're afraid of spiders).

 

Why is this important?

 

If you want to change your feelings, start with these building blocks. You'll always have a stimulus, and your awareness of things isn't always within your control. But how you feel about the stimulus can be reshaped. Go back to the spider example. If you don't want to be afraid of spiders, you might rehearse a different reaction, starting with a new judgment. You tell yourself spiders aren't scary and try not to react when you see one. Eventually, you won't feel the 'fear' anymore but might move to disinterest or even curiosity when you see a spider.

 

This takes time, but taking control of your emotions is invaluable. The key? Be consistent as you work on this change; soon, it will come naturally.

 

3 Unique Ways to Keep Your Mind Sharp

No matter what we do, we all have to reckon with Father Time eventually. 

 

You might already be feeling the effect of time. Maybe you don’t bounce back from a night out like you used to. Are you one of those people who let out some sort of grunt every time they get up from the couch? How is that hairline looking? 

 

If any of those sound familiar to you, then you already know that time comes for us all. 

 

Sadly, time also comes for our brain. It’s natural to get a little more forgetful or have more trouble focusing as you age. You don’t have to accept it graciously, though! If you follow these three unique tips, you will ensure that your mind stays sharp. 

 

Drink a Cup of Coffee

Now, this is the kind of tip that I can get behind! Starting your morning with a cup of coffee is not only a delicious way to wake up, but it can also increase your focus. Some studies have even shown that caffeine has an enhancing effect on long-term memory. 

 

Have a Laugh

 

This tip might even be more enjoyable than enjoying a nice coffee. Find a way to laugh a bit more. You will have to figure out what makes you laugh, but typically throwing on a funny movie or standup routine works. Other people might need more social interaction. A quick call to a close friend will usually include a few good belly laughs. 

Whichever way you get your kicks doesn’t matter, though. What does matter is the fact humor has been shown to improve student performance and decrease the stress hormone cortisol. This stress hormone can contribute to memory loss and other cognitive issues. A good laugh might help your memory! 

 

Pick Up Something Heavy

 

Ok, it might not be quite that simple, but at the end of the day, that is what strength training is. While all exercise is good for your health (brain and otherwise), resistance training is especially adept at boosting cognitive function.  

 

If you aren’t sure what strength training means, it is basically weightlifting. There are many programs for beginners, such as StrongLifts and Starting Strength, but working with a trainer to get the basics down is highly recommended. 

 

Keeping your mind sharp is not only important but also downright vital to a truly happy life. If you are bored with some of the traditional ways to keep your mind sharp, try one of the three suggestions above. You might have so much fun that you don’t even realize you are working to stay sharp! 

 

5 Different Ways to Practice Mindfulness

Want to become more mindful in your life but aren’t quite sure where to start? There are several different ways to practice mindfulness. Read on to find out more. 

 

1.    Meditate

 

The best way to increase mindfulness in your life is by setting aside time every day to meditate. Meditation creates a space for you to spend quality time with yourself! It allows you to evaluate both your emotions as well as your physical feelings. It can also help relieve stress and induce a calmer demeanor. If you want to become more mindful, you really must spend time in meditation each day.

 

2.    Spend Time Outside

 

Spending time outside in the fresh air can do wonders for your mentality. And the best part is, you don’t need any special training to implement this in your life. Start by going for a walk in a park near your house and paying attention to all the scenery around you.

 

3.    Start Your Day With A Purpose

 

Another way to practice mindfulness is by starting all of your days with a clear purpose. This can be done by waking up early and having a morning routine that lets you start the day relaxed and prepared. This morning routine can be meditating when you first wake up, completing breathing exercises, or even going for a nature walk before work.

 

4.    Watch What You Eat

 

Watching what you eat doesn’t necessarily mean you need to go on a diet. In this day and age, meals have become quick periods where you eat as fast as possible. Slow down, take each bite with purpose, notice all of the flavors you are consuming. And then pay attention after you finish eating to see how different foods affect your moods and health. You may be surprised by what you discover about your favorite foods. 

 

5.    Take Frequent Evaluation Pauses

 

Sometimes your life can be so hectic that you don’t spend any time on yourself. No matter what your schedule is like, now is the time to work in frequent pauses. These pauses don’t have to be long, just a few minutes to breathe deeply and evaluate how you feel and what you are thinking. You will find these mindful pauses will do wonders for stress relief.

 

Overall, leading a more mindful life isn’t that difficult. Simply start by trying one or a few of the items on this list, and you’ll be feeling more mindful in no time at all!

 

3 Ways to Supercharge Your Brain Power Through Exercise

You know exercise is good for your physical health, but did you know it’s also good for your brain? The latest neurological research has shown that there is a so-called ‘magic protein’ called Brain-Derived Neurotrophic Factor (BDNF) that has the power to supercharge your brain and improve your memory. And it is stimulated by cardiovascular exercise!

 

BDNF can rewire and build new neural pathways in the brain, especially in the crucial areas that control memory (the hippocampus) and analysis, thinking, and decision-making (the frontal lobes). Your frontal lobes are where most of the intellectual activity of the brain takes place, from processing the data that’s coming in all the time to problem-solving and making ethical decisions.  And you can keep these critical parts of your brain bathed in BDNF by merely increasing the amount of exercise in your daily routine. 

 

If you find it hard to commit to regular exercise, here are three ways you can make it easier and supercharge your brain at the same time. 

 

1.    Make it Fun

 

The key to maintaining an exercise regime is to choose an activity or activities that you enjoy. Not everyone likes going to the gym, but there are many other ways to increase your heart rate and get the BDNF pumping. 

 

Dancing, swimming, hiking out in nature, and bike riding will all get your heart rate up, and you’ll enjoy doing it. Even brisk walking will help. As a bonus, exercise will boost your endorphins, too, making you happier and more relaxed. 

 

2.    Schedule Your Exercise

 

It’s easier to stick to a regular exercise plan if you schedule time in your diary. Set aside time and increase your sessions until you’re exercising for thirty minutes, four or five times a week. Like any other habit, once you make it a priority, it will become just another part of your regular routine like brushing your teeth. 

 

3.    Make it Musical

 

Research has shown that music can increase motivation and happiness. Exercise will be much more fun if you’re bopping away to your favorite tunes. Even housework can become a brain-boosting dance routine when you’re vacuuming along to music that makes you smile. Turn up the volume and start cleaning to the beat!

 

Create a playlist of your favorite songs, and you will find that exercise is pleasurable and much easier to stick to when there’s upbeat music to encourage you!

 

Exercises To Be More Positive

According to recent polls, Americans are more anxious and stressed out than ever before. From inflation costs to post-pandemic stressors, war threats, and unrelenting pressure at home and work, people can’t help but feel uneasy and overwhelmed.

 

Luckily, there are things you can do to help ease the impact of stress on your daily life. For example, you can establish a routine that supports your mental and physical well-being.

 

Another is to do physical and mental activities that can help you become more positive and less apprehensive.

 

This article gathers some of the best exercises to help you relish a more positive lifestyle while successfully dealing with that feeling of restlessness that comes with living in times of uncertainty.

 

Physical Vs. Mental Exercises To Be More Positive

 

Through years of research, scientists have discovered that both physical and mental exercises impact how we see the world and our place in it. Our self-confidence increases, we have a more positive mindset, and we get sick less often.

 

Physical Exercises

 

Science tells us that physical exercise improves our overall health. We lose weight and get in shape, so our physical health gets a nice boost.

 

But that’s not all. When we work out regularly, we don’t just look good, we also start feeling good about ourselves as well.

 

Studies show that after just 15–20 minutes of exercise, your brain releases feel-good hormones. These chemicals flow through your system and begin to lower anxiety and depression. They also improve your self-esteem, lift your mood, and enhance cognitive functions.

 

The best exercises you can do to be more positive are aerobic exercises that get your heart pumping and the blood flowing through your veins.

 

Also, if you do these exercises outdoors in the fresh air, you’ll get double the benefits. One study shows that working out in nature improves self-esteem, reduces stress, and makes you feel more cheerful.

 

Mental Exercises

 

If you’re looking for ways to be more positive-minded, there are many mental exercises you can do like creating a vision board or starting a gratitude journal.

 

By practicing these exercises, also called mental health activities, you can do a bit of soul-searching and look inward to gain a better understanding of who you are. The better you know yourself, the easier you’ll find it to navigate through life’s ups and downs.

 

You know what your values and principles are, so whenever you’re at a crossroads and have to make a decision, you have a clear vision of what works best for you.

 

50 Positive-Thinking Exercises

 

1. Practice positive affirmations
2. Engage in physical activity
3. Do some gardening
4. Listen to your favorite music
5. Read more
6. Socialize in person
7. Meditate
8. Do yoga
9. Learn a new language
10. Dance
11. Learn Tai Chi
12. Get good quality sleep each night
13. Play brain games like chess, Sudoku, puzzles, and crosswords
14. Learn from the past
15. Practice forgiveness
16. Work on visualization
17. Celebrate your victories
18. Learn how to control negative self-talk
19. Express gratitude
20. Let go of the things that don’t make much difference in the long run
21. Volunteer
22. Do something thoughtful for someone you care about
23. Create a daily self-care routine
24. Focus on your breathing
25. Do something creative
26. Find your happy place
27. Accept the things you can’t control
28. Smile more
29. Limit the amount of negativity you allow into your life
30. Be kind to yourself
31. Avoid catastrophizing
32. Believe in yourself more
33. Learn from your mistakes
34. Do one thing each week that makes you feel uncomfortable
35. Create realistic goals
36. Read one positive quote each day
37. Create a vision board
38. Set clear boundaries when your workday ends and your personal time begins
39. Learn a new skill
40. Choose accountability over playing the victim
41. See the good in your world
42. Know that you’re worthy of good things
43. Sit up straight
44. Make it a point to learn something new every day
45. Be constructive in your criticism of yourself and others
46. Know your strengths and weaknesses
47. Practice compassion
48. Use the mirror technique
49. Make peace with the past
50. Turn off technology for 30 minutes each day

 

6 Hobbies For Physical Health

It’s an appealing idea to embody the Vulcan words of farewell, “live long and prosper.” However, navigating the creation of a long, healthy, and prosperous life can feel overwhelming, or worse, tedious. To combat this, it helps to make things that are good for us both accessible and fun. To that end, the following six hobbies for physical health have you covered.

 

1. Dance 

 

Incorporating dance into your life can be an organized event, such as taking a class, attending salsa night at a Latin club, or heading to a concert. However, it can also be more impromptu, like putting on music that gets you moving and dancing like no one is watching.  Regardless, it will be good for you.

 

A study for Complementary Therapies In Medicine found that exercise is as good as drug interventions for reducing the risk of overall mortality. In addition, they found that dance was a more enjoyable, easier-to-maintain, form of exercise that helps people to lose weight, improve flexibility, gain muscle tone, improve cardiovascular health, and convey social/emotional benefits.^[1]

2. Cycling 

 

You can ride a cruiser, invest in a peloton, downhill race, road bike cross country, or some other variation on the theme. There are many ways to cycle and each of them offers health benefits, a community of like-minded enthusiasts, and an enjoyable way to move your body.

3. Couples Yoga 

 

Yoga is good for you. Few would bother to argue that point. In this case, the more can definitely be the merrier. There are postures you can try with a partner that would be impossible alone. Plus, the social aspect reinforces relationships, another key component of overall health.

4. Running

 

The wonderful thing about running is that you can do it anywhere.  All it takes is you, a pair of shoes, and the will to get going.  When running in a new place, you see it in ways that you couldn’t otherwise. It’s immersive and personal. There’s also a meditative quality to it, an awareness of breath, gait, and environment that can firmly plant you in the present, enriching the moment and your life as a whole.

 

5. Swimming

 

This is an activity that provides it all: challenges, intensity, myriad variations, low impact, and immersion in a fundamental element. In addition, there is something comforting about being in the water, perhaps an unconscious reminder of the womb.   

 

6. Birding

 

Being in nature has been proven to benefit the mind, body, and spirit.^[2] When you add to this experience the mindful awareness of another species, the benefits multiply.  In a simple sense, you create a kind of treasure hunt as you attune your eyes to picking out new feathered friends. 

 

Each additional identification deepens and broadens your perception of the world around you. This connection increases your capacity to care for yourself and others by expanding your scope of care. Inclusiveness is good for everything.

 

The Takeaway

 

Making play out of the physical activities you engage in makes them more enjoyable and hence more sustainable over time. It doesn’t matter what you choose to do, what’s important is that you keep moving. Use these six hobbies for physical health as a springboard and explore some ideas of your own.  This is your adventure, make it a good one.

 

References:

1. Lakes, K. D., Marvin, S., Rowley, J., Nicolas, M. S., Arastoo, S., Viray, L., Orozco, A., & Jurnak, F. (2016). Dancer perceptions of the cognitive, social, emotional, and physical benefits of modern styles of partnered dancing. Complementary therapies in medicine, 26, 117–122. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ctim.2016.03.007
2. Robbins, J. (2020, January 9). Ecopsychology: How Immersion in Nature Benefits Your Health. Yale E360. Retrieved September 27, 2022, from https://e360.yale.edu/features/ecopsychology-how-immersion-in-nature-benefits-your-health

Heal Yourself: Get Back to Nature

Even the most anti-outdoorsy type has to admit that they feel calmer when they smell the fresh air and see the sunlight filtering in through the leaves. It fills us with a sense of comfort and relaxation.

 

Not only does it make us feel good, but it also heals us from the inside out. It shows in how we think more clearly and how our moods are restored when we’re around nature.

Keep reading to learn more about how to heal yourself through nature.

 

Why Do We Feel Good When We’re in Nature?

 

Getting back to nature acts as a reminder that we’re all part of the natural world. We’re all connected somehow, which is why you feel at peace when you’re in a quiet forest or a meadow.

 

Think of when you walk barefoot on the beach or a patch of green grass. You know that pleasant feeling you get? It feels like you’re home, comfortable, relaxed, and at ease.

 

The best part is all the stress and tension you’ve been holding onto melts away somehow. It’s like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders, and you feel freer and lighter.

 

How Can We Reconnect with Nature?

 

Finding opportunities to reconnect with nature and take advantage of its healing benefits can be a challenge in our hectic lifestyles. Yet, you don’t have to go camping in the middle of nowhere to enjoy nature. Instead, there are ways you can do just that right in the comfort of your own home.

 

Take a look.

 

Gardening

 

Don’t lose hope if you’re not into hiking or camping outdoors. You can still be close to nature but in a different way.

 

For example, you can plant a vegetable garden in your yard. Tending to plants allows you to spend a good deal of time with nature and connect with the earth.

 

You get to breathe in the fresh smell of the soil and the plants themselves. But, of course, that’s even more enjoyable if you’re planting fragrant plants, such as jasmines, roses, or lilies.

 

You also get to connect to nature in a hands-on, visceral way that, for some people, can become very personal. In fact, many gardeners say that when they’re tending their gardens, they feel a deeper bond with nature they hadn’t felt before.

 

Many also feel that gardening makes them feel that they’re part of something bigger than themselves. This special connection allows them to bridge the gap between our hectic, modern world and the natural world.

 

Mindfulness Meditation

 

Being outdoors is such a wonderful opportunity to slow down and breathe. Look around and see all the colors around you. Take in how the light plays through the leaves or reflects off a big, shiny rock.

 

Next, close your eyes and take a deep breath. Inhale as much fresh, clean air as you can to cleanse out your lungs from the smog and fumes, we’re so used to taking in.

 

Then, stop and listen. Really listen to the birds and crickets chirping, as well as any other creatures, big or small.

 

Also, if there’s a brook or stream nearby, pay close attention to the sound of the water. Studies show that the sound of running water is calming and can even have an anti-depressant effect.

 

Yet, the best thing to listen out for in nature is nothing. That calm quietude has become so rare that we sometimes don’t know just how much we miss.

 

Forest Bathing

 

‘Forest bathing,’ or ‘shinrin-yoku’ in Japanese, is the art of moving slowly and mindfully through a forest. The aim of this Asian practice is for you to engage all your five senses along the way.

 

So, with each step, you take in all the sights, sounds, and smells of your surroundings. This experience is similar to mindful meditation, which we mentioned above.

 

Yet, it goes beyond stimulating the parasympathetic nervous system or reducing your stress levels. Forest bathing also helps increase anti-inflammatory properties in your body and boost your immune system, all thanks to the terpenes you inhale as you’re walking through the forest.

 

Conclusion

 

More and more, people are starting to realize that the best way to heal themselves is by getting back to nature. It’s true that the more time we take to relax and unwind in nature, the better off we’ll be.