You Are Worth It!

Do you sometimes feel like you are a work in progress?  Do you feel the drive to keep improving yourself and then find yourself in a spiral of despair because you just never feel like you measure up? For many people, this is their reality. Research has shown that this may be one of the most common causes of weight gain and emotional eating disorders.  

 

All of us need to find freedom from the cycle that we are imperfect. While we all have room to grow and develop; the most freeing of all realities about ourselves that we need to absorb and accept is that we are a unique and beautiful human being. There is no one quite like us on this earth and there never will be. Once we accept this for ourselves, we can then look for ways to make the good in us better. Without this perspective, we will constantly strive to find some self-acceptance and won’t move much beyond this point in our life. 

 

An old African proverb reminds us that if we don’t have any enemies inside us, then no external enemies can cause us harm or hurt. Have you noticed when things are going well on the inside and you are feeling secure and happy with life, things that go wrong in your life don’t seem to be so bad, but when you are feeling bad about yourself, things are so different? The world seems to take on a much darker feeling and it’s more difficult to cope when things are not going right? 

 

Learning to love yourself and to appreciate the uniqueness you are is often the first stage of learning how to control your weight, feel confident in studying or changing careers, or learning a new hobby. Many of the things we procrastinate over that are for our own benefit and enrichment are often the things we don’t do, because perhaps deep inside we don’t think we are good enough or worthy enough to do these things for ourselves.  

 

Challenge those thoughts and starting tomorrow - Choose one thing you want to do for you. Because guess what, you are worth it! Most people have to battle the self-talk and rarely say anything nice about themselves. Try looking in the mirror when you wake up and tell your reflection what you would tell your best friend... You are worth it!

The Importance of Conflict Resolution that Validates the Other Person’s Perspective

Most people approach differences of opinions with other people attempting to defend their point of view. Our intention may be to defend our personal position, but most people view our defensive stance as attacking their viewpoint. It can create confrontation and easily leads to interpersonal issues with the other person. This approach to conflict resolution creates many avoidable arguments in the work place and home. 

 

So how can we present our point of view without creating this reaction in people? The key is to learn to see the situation from the other’s point of view and address it from within their viewpoint as well as from our own. We can still express our thoughts and feelings about a situation using this approach, but it usually produces a very different outcome.  

 

This technique is an excellent way to approach all communication, whether with family, friends, work colleagues or strangers. We learn to express our thoughts, concerns and ideas and even disagree with others, but acknowledge verbally and through our body language, that the other person has the right to their opinions and thoughts about the issue causing the disagreement. 

 

This approach maintains a relationship between two people that acknowledges that no one position is more valid than another’s views, perspectives or thoughts. This does not mean that both ideas are equally valid, but conveys the understanding that the other person has a right to the thoughts or opinions about the situation causing the disagreement. This approach values the relationship and validates the person, whilst not necessarily validating the problem or the suggested solution. 

 

There is an old saying that states, “you will never know another person until you first walk in their shoes.” Trying to approach and diffuse a situation from their perspective enables us to walk in their shoes in the situation. It changes the “I want” statements, which presents the issue from our perspective to the “I know you feel this way and can understand why you do, but may I present another idea or show you why that idea is not the best one.”

 

As we learn and apply this technique in our lives, it becomes obvious we have gained insight into an extremely important life lesson that validates and maintains relationships, even if we don’t agree with the other person. It helps us to approach potential conflict situations in a non-confrontational way that promotes discussion and resolution.

The Importance of Active Listening

Do you find yourself misunderstanding what your spouse or work colleague say to you? Do you find yourself questioning your responses to them? Most people hear others speaking to them, but most of the time our interactions are not focused and we may listen to people speak, without truly hearing what they want to say to us. Learning how to listen is a skill that helps us to clear our mind of thoughts and behaviors that may interrupt our ability to hear what the other person is trying to say, rather than what we think they are saying.  

 

Learning how to listen to people around us is also a journey of self-discovery. Instead of responding to people’s comments and thoughts as a reaction, we take the time to understand what they are saying and in thinking about how their words are impacting us, we are identifying the natural way to react to people’s words and think about how we would prefer to react to them. 

 

We can then develop and practice self-control techniques, to assist us to respond more appropriately to anything people may say to us.

 

You may have heard active listening referred to as reflective listening. It involves listening to others around us talk to us and taking time out to ensure we understand their words and the meanings behind those words. We ask questions like “so you mean this.” to reflect back to the person what we think they said. We use words like “I feel angry when you say that” rather than lashing out in anger and using a “you” phrase like “you always do this.” 

 

Our focus is not on the words spoken but on the person speaking and what they meant by their words. This way of listening can take some getting used to, but once we learn this skill will change the way we relate to people and interact with them, and learn about ourselves in the process.

 

If you sometimes feel misunderstood when you are talking to people, you probably have an understanding of the importance of really being heard and not just listened to. As we begin to practice active listening, you will soon learn the phrases and body languages that you personally find difficult to deal with. You will develop important techniques and qualities that enable you to remain in control of your thoughts and emotions when having discussions with others. 

Anticipating and Preparing for Change and Stressful Situations to Minimize Distress

All of us face change in our life. Sometimes we love it, look forward to it and enjoy the preparations that are involved in making it happen. On other occasions, change can be very distressing. Usually occurring without warning, we are usually unprepared for it. We can feel quite disorientated when change is unexpected and it can produce physical reactions we may feel we have little control over.

 

Facing unplanned change with a prepared mind helps to re orientate life even when it seems to be out of our control. If we accept that change is inevitable, we see the sense in thinking about and preparing to deal with it well ahead of when it actually happens. It also helps us reflect on how we will deal with our responses when faced with stress and change.

 

Taking the time to plan and prepare for change is not inviting fate, but facing reality People who work in occupations that involve dealing with sudden unexpected emergencies, are in a state of readiness at all times. They learn to anticipate all possible scenarios by learning how to deal with them before they occur. They learn how to prevent the situation or minimize its harm, and they learn to enact certain actions when these events do occur. 

 

We gain valuable insight into how to prepare for change by learning how to apply their approaches to potential change and stressful situations. We prepare for change, or potential stresses in three ways: Firstly, the higher the risk of something happening, the more we should anticipate it likely to happen. People living in areas where there is a high risk of a natural disaster occurring, prepare for its inevitably, by preparing their surroundings each year and psychologically being ready for it.  

 

Contrary to people may think, being psychologically prepared for change is possible. Although it is impossible to know what it will be like to face being a parent for example, we can prepare ourselves by reading and identifying possible areas of concern we may personally face in our new parenting role. 

 

Thirdly, we can learn to manage our responses and thoughts in times of minor changes and challenge. As we do this, we are providing ourselves with invaluable training. Learning how to deal with the many minor challenges and changes we face daily, will help us to develop the skills to deal with the unexpected major ones.

Achieving Life Balance

Most of us have things in our lives we want to do, as well as those things we have to do. Perhaps you want to go to the gym more often, or you want to read more books this year. Like most of us, do you find yourself wishing you had more time to pursue the things you want to do as well as the things you need to do? 

 

Whilst time management is important to achieving these goals, some other steps must precede it. As you define these steps, preferably using a journal to keep track of what you discover about yourself, they will help you achieve that work and life balance that will enable you to do those things you want to do and achieve at this point in your life.

List Your Goals

All of us have goals that change regularly and that reflect other things going on in our life at the time. List your goals and prioritize them from important to least important. Include not only the goals you have to achieve, but also the personal goals you want to achieve.

List Your Daily Schedule

 

Although we want more time in the day, all of us have 24 hours. We use some of these hours for sleep and some of these for work and recreation purposes. List down your daily schedule and include the things you must do because they are a commitment. This may include work commitments or school sport commitments with the children.

 

Prioritize Your Personal Goals with Equal Priority as Work Related Goals

 

Don’t minimize the time available to do the things you want to do, particularly if they are contributing to your life goals or wellbeing. Include family time and other essential life activities that require your time and attention.

 

Keep to the Schedule unless in an Emergency 

 

Most people who create a daily schedule, keep to it for a while, but not long enough for it to become a habit. Habits take around 3 weeks to form, so if you want your new approach to work and lifestyle to be maintained, you must protect it at all costs. If you want to achieve your own personal goals, you must protect them at all costs. Eventually, the changes you implement will become second nature, but until then, you need to stay in control of your time management. 

What Is Magnetic Personality Development

The law of attraction says that whatever you put your focus on is whatever you get. When you put your focus on the spiritual matters of human personality growth you opt to convey a supernatural magnetic attraction. The question that you are supposed to ask yourself is whether this magnetism is consequential to that unmotivated state where you do not have to bring about as very deprived. In this case you will find that a situation of self-reliance becomes a sound opportunity for self-development. There are a number of ways which are very vital when it comes to considering the magnetic attractiveness of somebody thought to be spiritual.       

 

The first one is the fixed idea. This is the law of magnetism in a linguistic act. This is based on the continual and repeated association with various fixed, vast and extremely attractive idea like God, love or peace fixed into operation diverse deeply subliminal operations of the heart. These operations however are completely unnoticed and they are not clear in our normal lives, they slowly and positively gather and organize all personal powers and stimulate a balancing of the entire mind and body system. This fresh balance lastly manifests itself in the physical and spiritual perception as equal and highly assimilating force. This operation as it repeats itself over and over again; it shapes an individual and completely changes him. And so, this transformed person will therefore change those other people who are around him. 

 

The second step is the aura in the unequal field of energy. This is also considered as the individual’s environment. These spiritual and personal environments reveal the thought of the internal being. It generates an ideal field for magnetism but if only the spiritual being and the body are healthy. The connection with law of attraction is that whatever you think is what you get. 

 

When you have focus then nothing will stop you from getting it. This is because the earlier far objection of success experienced is increased and all the distractions that are near are removed from the way. The fourth and the last step is to identify yourself with those who have good personality so that you can also borrow some traits from them. Personality development in such a great way it determines our destiny. When you have a good personality growth, you will find that whatever you do is the way you want. This is simply because you are organized.

Personality Development at the Stage of Childhood

The main factor that pressures or brings about personality development is in place and very much functional when the babies is still in the mother’s womb, however the doctors oppose to this. The people who do psychiatry have come up with their own theories which state that the personality of a human being grows in particular progressive period the minute we are born. They are however exploratory and not definite in the real sense. These phases are not there the way the psychiatric theories claim. The supposed personality periods hypothetically come about in ways related to physical stages of growth like crawling, walking and running. However, our bodily development stages look suitable but this is not exactly what happens when it comes to our personalities.

 

Let us first talk about how personality starts. It begins to evolve when we are still in our mothers’ wombs. The main factors that power personality is finely reinforced before one gets to early childhood. Every person’s intention, attitude, way of thinking, feelings, actions and the way he reacts influences one’s personality growth negatively or positively. There are two major ways that a person develops his personality. One can develop his personality with the right choice or the second one is that he can develop with the wrong choices. This will greatly determine your personality which people will use to describe you. You will find that those people who are mean develop poisonous personalities within no time due to numerous ongoing, self-centered, wrong, deceitful and immature choices. 

 

On the other hand, positive and fit personality is made with many ongoing, kindness, right, love, honesty, and admirable dependable choices. You will find that most of us mean people have made a choice to look at life in either angry way or in a fearful way. The particular way becomes the basic way that we inconsiderately control as we try to get whatever we want or to evade what we do not want in many circumstances and relations. And so you will find that whether you are fearful or basically angry, that is how your personality will bring about itself.  

 

The next thing that we are going to look at in personality development is learning. There are numerous theories which claim that learning is the main factor in development of personality and manners. It is obvious that there are many mental and physical activities that need to be learned. This however does not apply in personality development and characteristics. These are two very different things. You should note that personality does not rely on learning and neither is it innate at conception it only grows at the early stages of childhood.

Personality Development as a Way to Your Success

Personality development plays a very crucial part in a person’s success. Many people have that feeling of inadequacy that has got to be conquered. For us to be success we must possess a positive attitude towards everything that we do. You will find that most people have got negative voice in their heads that stop them from doing anything. These voices discourage us most of the time. This will make us to feel that we are not good enough and we cannot make it. And so with this we cannot be able to see past our destiny and obscurity thoughts. And this courses us not to move forward due to our poor belief of ourselves.

 

There are other people who will show an attitude of supremacy. This could be a true feeling or just to cover the feeling of inferiority that we have within us. There is nobody in this wide world who would accept their weak points. People do not like an attitude of pride. However, for you to be liked and be respected you must have the correct feelings of yourself this is what will bring about your personality. There are those people who are easy to judge and once you see them you spot a feeling of no confidence in them. This greatly tampers with your relation. This is because some will tend to look down on them and you will find that they are quickly turned off. You cannot control other people if you do not know yourself and your ability to do something. 

 

Your success in the future greatly depends on the personality development that you have. You have to balance between self-confidence and meekness. Humility means that you have a diffident view of yourself. This is knowing that those who are around you are better in some ways and you are also better in other ways. People usually think that when you are humble then you are weak and you cannot stand for your rights. When you are humble, it does not mean that you must put yourself under or below others. You must accept that strength and that weakness that you have because this is what you are. What you think of as strength may be a weakness.

 

When you know your weaknesses, you will be able to work on them and make them your strengths. Humility means that you are placing yourself in the right position. You might be struggling but that does not mean that you look down upon yourself.

Meanings of Personality Development

In this world there are so many people and each person has a very different definition of what personality is. Human beings are very unique organisms. This is because they possess a very powerful element called the mind. They are the only creatures with this tool not any other animal in the whole planet has this element. The other animals have got the brain just like the human beings but the ability of their brain is only to some degree unlike the human beings. And so because of our powerful mind, we are able to control the whole world. This is very important to note because it plays a very important part in personality. It is the one that develops, enriches and boosts our personality in both internal and external beauty. 

 

There are several meanings of the word personality from different sources and the dictionary has got numerous meanings. One of the main meanings of personality is that it is a set of a person’s characteristic. These set is made up of a person’s attitude, interests, different ways of behavior, the way one responds to emotions, the part that he plays in the society and many other personal qualities that last for a very long time. These characteristics are the ones that make one attractive and also to be noticed and thus socially interesting. It could also mean a very well-known person, a person who is famous an example of such a person is an entertainer or an athlete. It could also mean an extraordinary person who is distinguishing. It is also the features of being a person and which make you to exist.  

 

These are the meanings which only look at the outside of a person but then they are true. The only way that we can be able to know a stranger is through the outside or what he has worn. This is because we cannot know his character or behavior from just looking at the person. Many people however judge one’s personality from the external that is the looks. This is not supposed to be the case. To know the personality of a person you have to stay with them for some time.        

 

You should also note that we do not inherit personality traits and neither are they inborn. They develop in us the minute we are born. We are the developers of our personality. People around us could help us to develop but the truth is that we are the main developers. So, for us to have personality we have to learn both academic and extracurricular activities.