In a world where everyone is busy trying to make their way to success, you find that there is a need for people to become more self-reliant. While we look to our close friends and family for support, we need to develop a level of independence. It allows us some control over the direction of our lives.
There is nothing more powerful than being your person. Having the freedom to make your own decisions and dictate the course of your life can be a heady experience. It allows you to curate the map of your life.
The challenge today is how most people rely so much on external factors to be happy. Being happy has become associated with materiality. It has become about being in superficial relationships for the sake of being ‘couple goals’. It has also been reduced to the trendiest cars and most expensive mansions.
With the pressure of social media, many are forced to conform to a certain standard of life for them to be socially acceptable. We trade our identities and our values to suit the perception that people have of what we ought to be. This is why we have so many people working themselves to the bone trying to attain prestigious titles in the corporate world, all while they still feel that empty void within themselves.
Our level of dependence has us blaming those who hurt us in our past for our lack of progress. We keep looking to others to save us from the rut that our lives have become, never fully realizing that no one can save us except ourselves. Everyone else is too busy with their race. Even your closest circle may not always be there to carry your burdens for you. It is only when we learn to draw strength from within ourselves that we find the power to climb out of the pit and back onto the path of fulfillment.
Self-reliance is the key to happiness.
There is potential for you to be great. No one can unlock it for you except yourself. It takes guts to step out of the comfort of family and friends to find your wings. When you learn to be independent, you get to discover who you are as a person and what you want out of your life. It ceases to be about what other people expect you to become. It becomes about finding your purpose and building on your vision.
You cannot deny how good it feels to accomplish great things under the steam of your strength. Not only does discovering what you are capable give you confidence, but it also keeps you motivated to discover more hidden skills in you. Instead of sitting on the sidelines, you develop the confidence to put your skills to the test. That is the story for every successful person. They developed enough confidence to go into unchartered territories and made names for themselves. It is also possible for that story to become yours.
Think back to the decisions you have made over the years. How many of them were influenced by other people? If you are, to be honest, some choices you made were not the best for you. If you had a major decision that would propel you into success, would you not jump at it without second-guessing it? That is what self-reliance rewards you with- the ability to make choices that are right for you, without concerning yourself with people’s opinions about it.
While it is good to seek guidance on major decisions, let no one else hold the power to steer your life in the wrong direction. All the choices you make should center on what you want so that you avoid having any regrets. The beauty of independent thinking is that you get to make the right decision with no one forcing their opinions on you. With self-reliance, you can listen to advise from others but, ultimately, you know it is your decision and only you must live with the consequences.
Depending on yourself gives you control over your life. It allows you to go out and make mistakes, learning and growing from them. It is the surest way to develop compassion for yourself and others when you know that you have tried your best despite the outcome of your endeavors being unfavorable.
How to stop being too dependent on other people.
Discover yourself.
Individuality is important in all your associations. Never allow yourself to be absorbed into another person’s life so much that you end up losing sight of who you are and what you want. Maintain your existence. Have your friends. Indulge your interests. Spend time with yourself outside of your relationships with others. Only then can you discover what is hidden in you.
Be more assertive.
It is important to have a voice. Have a say in the decisions that impact your life. Become more confident in yourself. Know your worth so that people do not walk all over you. If you are assertive, people will respect your opinions and value your contribution.
Take up responsibility for your life.
Nothing makes you more self-reliant than being responsible for your own decisions and your happiness. Accept that the power to change your life lies in your hands and no one else’s. Be responsible to do certain tasks for yourself. You can start cleaning up after yourself, organizing your office space.
You can only achieve true happiness in life when you are in control of your thoughts, choices, and behaviors. While you may lean on others from time to time for support and help, you should not depend on them for your happiness or survival. And only when you can stand on your own two feet in this way can you feel self-reliant and genuinely content.
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