Why Stop Being Negative?

Let’s drop the bomb and begin this article by being negative – you will never succeed in any endeavor you choose with a negative composure and outlook. And pretending not to be one but really starting to get pissed and defending yourself after reading the first sentence, will not either. Moving on, how NOT to be one then? 

 

Negative or negativity, let’s define as something that is obviously not something that is positive (for the good). It is a reaction to causes stress and unhappy feelings. It has the potential to wreak havoc to relationships, destroy possibilities and chances for growth and new beginnings. How so? For example, a negative person is faced with a situation, he will assume that everything is about him – the challenge, the heavy emotions, other’s reaction. Instead of thinking a healthy way out of his situation, he will be consumed by his negativity and can become stuck in the situation. Either that he will regress or be full of anger at anything that comes his way. The result? Nothing that will benefit him. 

 

The above is just one sample scenario showing negativity. I in real life, the chances are aplenty, the situations – repeatedly happens. Why suffer in this kind of cycle? Being in the nega-zone lowers your self-confidence even more. When you think that everything is against you, how can you confidently face people and situations? 

 

Lucky you! there are a lot of self-help and self-care options available in the market that will /can/may bring out the enthusiastic, positive and happy you! Who knows, the road to self- improvement may just be ten chapters away. Start with the short ones, those that are easy to read and carry. An eBook perhaps? And of course, remind yourself that it doesn’t end at the last chapter – walk the talk and you’ll turn out fine!

 

Five Tips to Boost Self-Confidence

Have you ever wondered how some people whose physical looks may seem to meet magazine standards but experience having a hard time being noticed in a crowd? How about that friend of yours who seem to fill a space with his funny stories and laughter? Remember that experience of yours when somebody with a beautiful smile entered your dull meeting room and suddenly filled it with radiance? The common denominator in these three instances is self-confidence. 

 

Indeed, self-confidence levels affects your life in ways that it really does matter. So, if you feel like lacking in that area, how do you boost it? Here are five easy ways: 

 

1. Always remember that no situation is permanent. Meaning, you have the power to change any situation you are in. 

 

2. Even emotions are not permanent – sadness, joy, pain, happiness. All these can change by the minute. 

 

3. What matters really is how you react to the different situations you will be faced in your lifetime and emotions you will have to go through day by day. 

 

4. If you focus on the negative, then chances are, it is all that you will see. Imagine how terrible your days ahead are. 

 

5. If you focus on the positive, then chances are, it is what you will see in every situation you will face, even the difficult ones. Imagine how light your life may/can be. 

 

And, if you notice, the list above is just five amongst the many ways to boost your confidence levels. If you want to start getting a grip at what’s essential, then there are lots of materials that can help you. Short eBooks are aplenty and comes in handy, can easily fit your lifestyle. Content-wise, to be honest, some are great while others are so-so. This is why you need to be a smart consumer and just don’t rely on beautiful covers! 

 

The Ugly Monsters of Today

Almost every adult issue stem from childhood. So, the best way to understand some of your quirkiness is to relive your childhood memories. But, remember to do it with preparation and readiness. If not, then you might just hurl down memory lane, hurt yourself a bit more and get stuck. Your goal is not to hate your parents more (just in case) or your bully cousin for pushing you on your 9^th birthday party. What you are trying to do is to remember where the ugly monsters of today are coming from, cut it at its roots, and plant new seeds (happiness, acceptance, forgiveness). 

 

Where to start? Keep in mind that just like any other task in your life, the beginning may not be easy but if to stick to it till the end, you just might get more than what you’ve been expecting. Below are starter steps: 

 

1. Make a list of your negative thoughts – you feel not accepted, you feel unworthy, you feel you are not capable of doing something.

 

2. Trace back important events in your life especially those in your childhood that really traumatized you. 

 

3. Think of the people involved in your important events and notice how you feel about them.

 

4. Tell yourself that everything happened in the past and that carrying that baggage of yesterday is quite a heavy burden to bear today.

 

5. Start unburdening. Start forgiving and moving forward. Come to think of it, the people you hold grudge to, may not even be aware of the hurt they may have caused you. especially if they too, are still young at the time of the event/incident. 

 

6. There will be situations where adults and important people in your life may get involved in your past issues. It is a reality though that in this situation, moving forward is harder. But it can still happen. 

 

Strengthen your will to improve your life. Only you hold the key.

 

Possible Reasons Why You Think and Feel Low About You

Why do you shy out when deep inside yourself, you know that you can? Why won’t you smile and rather sulk in a corner? When you have a better idea, why do you keep it to yourself? Are you afraid to be tagged as obnoxious? Or, are you afraid to make mistakes? 

 

There are countless reasons why you may think and feel low about yourself. Let us list down the possible top three.

Your possible lack of education

This can be easily combatted. Educate yourself through books, eBooks, seminars, workshops, etc. Nowadays, there are hundreds of free online courses offered by schools around the globe. Education can now be accessed easier.

Unresolved childhood issues

This can become quite ugly. Unresolved childhood issues have the potential to evolve into something uglier – like low self-esteem and ruin your adult life. It comes apparent in many aspects in your life- relationships, general and work attitude, etc. So think about it and do something about it. Now is the best time, always.

Not having supportive parents or having been neglected by nurturers

This is somewhat related to the second reason but this one includes every nurturer that you have come in contact with growing up. Now that you are not a child anymore and maybe an adult yourself trying to make ends meet, you may have a better understanding of why some

 

Self-care Towards Self-Confidence

How do you take care of yourself? this is an important factor you should give focus to if you want to start gaining confidence. How could you face a crowd if you constantly slouch and wear dirty clothing? Moreover, how can you confidently deliver a speech or share your thoughts if you miss dentist appointments? Physically, you can start by making sure that you have a clean body. It is your vessel, the first thing that gets noticed. Before anything else, what we mean by focusing on the physical doesn’t equate to going narcissistic and scheduling an appointment to a body surgeon. it starts with accepting what you are born with, maximizing your positive traits and keeping a healthy body. Eating healthy, having an exercise routine (no matter how simple), sticking to a positive lifestyle (especially if you are 30 and up) can go a long way when it comes to self-care. 

 

Your thoughts, attitude and stance also matter. This are important factors to your over-all health. Remember what experts say – you are your thoughts. This means that if you always have a positive approach to things and situations, then the chances to attract diseases and ugly fights becomes far. 

 

Self-care is knowing which battles to fight. There are some things better left alone. Toxic relationships are one and also a big no-no when it comes to self-care. This will take a toll on you, sometimes without you noticing. Self-care is loving yourself first, before anyone else. When you start taking care of yourself, then you will start to condition your mind that you are worthy. This feeling gives you confidence and morale. If you still want to know more about this matter or want to know more ways on how to do self-care towards self-confidence, a lot of eBooks are available at the market.

 

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